@KenJennings - This infinite-time Jeopardy! champ isn't just beauty-- he's got the brains for jokes, too!
@jakefogelnest - Radio, TV, and podcast hero, not to mention level 69 music and pop culture wizard.
@BESTPORNCOMMENT - An ongoing collection of comments posted on porn videos. No more watching all those icky nude bodies to get to the good stuff.
@TriciaLockwood - Some of the sharpest wit you can find on a computer. And poetry, too!
@ChuckGrassley - Regardless of your politics, it's pretty enjoyable how completely inept Senator Chuck Grassley of Iowa is at Twitter.
REFORMED HOG - Former member of the swine family, has now agreed to behave like a proper dog. Free to patient home willing to overlook physical defects. 555-2519
What do you do when The Dark Knight himself pulls a boner?
Available in Large, which is actually a Medium stretched out to appear bigger.
If you're in a tight spot, this is going to be really helpful (I'M JOKING. I'M KIDDING AROUND)
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.