We're all familiar with prestigious accolades like The Emmys, The Oscars, and The Blockbuster Music Awards, but did you know doing stuff on the Internet can yield similarly priceless trophies and medals? Yes, it's true. Yet, in 15 years of writing for the web, I've utterly failed to win a single award that's just as valid as the more popular ones and not at all designed to prop up a rapidly dying medium. At the risk of burning some very important bridges, allow me to share my list of the awards that I should have received for my unique talents, but didn't.
Trying to change history is a terrible mistake. Tearing down all of America's Hitler statues has left us confused about our nation's proud past.
Ask any cowboy and they'll tell you: The deadliest snake in the wild west is Lava-Filled Hole Shaped Exactly Like A Cowboy Silhouette
Ben Garrison's Cartoons are finally explained!
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.