PAGE OF SHAME

As promised last week, here are a handful of the worst images submitted for this theme. There actually wasn't much that disgusted me, so this won't be as heavy as some of the recent pages of shame. Everyone generally did a pretty good job and I was happy with how things played out, with the exception being the following images. Oh, and I apologize profusely. It seems my image tagging software went haywire.

adumb made this powerful picture commenting on Arisitide's tenuous relationship with the United States. Unfortunately it's about as comical as getting a horse hoof stuck in your rectal cavity while being forced to watch C-Span. Such situations are rare, I know, but not as rare as you might think. His cut and paste job is pretty terrible as well, but seeing as how doing things right takes more than ten minutes we can't fault him. We can, however, throw rocks at him. Big pointy rocks with shards of glass taped to them.

Ikickfish made this ugly festering pile of pixilated stink that probably would have looked nicer if he took the time to make it cleaner, easier to read, and less ugly. I vaguely remember watching and not enjoying the movie he's referencing, but it fails to get me all hot and bothered, and, in fact, does irreparable damage to my genital region. The usual bad cutting/pasting and readability issues are present, as is my desire to punch Ikickfish in the gullet.

Jangofeet didn't do too bad with his Pac-Man image featured earlier in this Phriday, but he got greedy and thought the joke would go a lot further. In the process he made this heap of horror that looks about as pleasant as a rave flyer. Since, to my knowledge, Phriday is not about giving ecstasy-addled children something to drool at, I deem this image a real kick in the face. Quit when you're ahead next time.

I'm going to be honest. I really don't like Mafialligator. I don't hate the guy by any means, but I don't think I've seen a single contribution of his that didn't look like some kind of canine stool sample he took a picture of with a cheap digital camera and uploaded. I think at one point I even requested he never open a graphics program ever again because his work was so deplorable that it made me want to physically harm my monitor. Well, I'm going to take this time to humbly request that Mafialligator uninstall Adobe Photoshop or any similar graphics program, and if possible, return his computer to the store of purchase and never go near technology again. If you think that's harsh, please enjoy the following three images, all courtesy of Mafialligator. He obviously spent time on these, possibly upwards of 30 seconds each, but I just don't think he has it in him to ever produce anything visually appealing.

That's it. That's all there is. Sorry if you found this entirely too brief, but my whining only goes so far anyway. Join us next week when we photoshop our favorite country bears.

– Josh "Livestock" Boruff (@Livestock)

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