Wed, 23 May 2012 18:00:00 +0000 Something Awful http://www.somethingawful.com/ en-us radium@somethingawful.com webmaster@somethingawful.com http://i.somethingawful.com/core/sa_logo_144.png http://www.somethingawful.com/ 144 42 daryl.f.hall@gmail.com (Daryl "Fucking" Hall) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/awful-links/duke-euphoria-junkpile.php Wed, 23 May 2012 13:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/awful-links/duke-euphoria-junkpile.php occupyjapan@somethingawful.com (Seth "Occupy Japan" Bailey) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/awfulvision/awfulvision-is-back.php You (didn't) want it, you got it (anyway)! AwfulVision is back! This comeback edition features Rappin' Republicans, IRL Rage Comics, affordable carpet and The Worst Presidential Candidate Ever. Wed, 23 May 2012 00:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/awfulvision/awfulvision-is-back.php livestock@somethingawful.com (E. C. Fouke) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/fouke-orphan-meat.php Greetings to you, my fellow American Carnivore. I am pleased and delighted to bring you another edition of my celebrated periodical, the most spirited tribute to the healthy and unabated consumption of all living beasts. Wed, 23 May 2012 00:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/fouke-orphan-meat.php docevil@somethingawful.com (Jon "@fart" Hendren) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/twitter-tuesday/tt05-22-12.php Just follow @dril. Tue, 22 May 2012 04:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/twitter-tuesday/tt05-22-12.php docevil@somethingawful.com (Jon "@fart" Hendren) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/pleasure-texts-1.php The story of eternal pleasures, as told through those who lived it. Tue, 22 May 2012 03:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/pleasure-texts-1.php garbageday@somethingawful.com (Andrew "Garbage Day" Miller) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/comedy-goldmine/sink-cat-rug.php Wilford Brimley cat gets wet. Dragon Lady rug draws praise. Threads deliver what's promised. Tue, 22 May 2012 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/comedy-goldmine/sink-cat-rug.php zackparsons@somethingawful.com (Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/nato-signs-chicago.php Protestors gathering in Chicago are throwing their message in the face of NATO using bold signs, and NATO is taking them seriously. Mon, 21 May 2012 05:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/nato-signs-chicago.php shmorky@somethingawful.com (GameScute) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/flash-tub/gamescott-diablo-3.php gamedcdcdgtot Sun, 20 May 2012 23:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/flash-tub/gamescott-diablo-3.php ianthegenius@hotmail.com (Martin R. "Vargo" Schneider and Sean "Keanu Grieves" Hanson) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/current-movie-reviews/dictator-expecting.php Summer is in full swing, which means everything is terrible. Sun, 20 May 2012 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/current-movie-reviews/dictator-expecting.php ctstalker@somethingawful.com (Dennis "Corin Tucker's Stalker" Farrell) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/music-article/campfire-guitar-guy.php Do you have what it takes to become Campfire Guitar Guy? You're not sure? Good. Having an insecurity that you'd like to hide is the first step. Sat, 19 May 2012 00:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/music-article/campfire-guitar-guy.php ctstalker@somethingawful.com (Dennis "Corin Tucker's Stalker" Farrell) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/sports-rulebook-madness.php In an ongoing effort to keep their products safe, fair, and enjoyable, professional sports leagues update their rulebooks every year. These changes don't always stick. In fact, some rules are so disastrous that they don't even last through an entire season. Sat, 19 May 2012 00:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/sports-rulebook-madness.php zackparsons@somethingawful.com (Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/flesh-eating-bacteria.php Kelly is our miracle girl. Every day she gets stronger than the day before, no matter how many pieces of her body melted off. Fri, 18 May 2012 05:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/flesh-eating-bacteria.php garbageday@somethingawful.com (Andrew "Garbage Day" Miller) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/photoshop-phriday/cutrate-literary-classics.php In these tough economic times, even the mighty publishing industry has to cut some corners! Fri, 18 May 2012 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/photoshop-phriday/cutrate-literary-classics.php zackparsons@somethingawful.com (Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/feature-articles/romney-donor-obama.php A vile Obama campaign website targets innocent private citizens who have donated money to Mitt Romney. Thu, 17 May 2012 05:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/feature-articles/romney-donor-obama.php bobservo@somethingawful.com (The Triple Amputee Extra) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/triple-amputee-extra.php One man's struggle with being a unique voice of the film community. Thu, 17 May 2012 00:30:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/triple-amputee-extra.php garbageday@somethingawful.com (Andrew "Garbage Day" Miller) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/awful-links/dragonesslife.php Wed, 16 May 2012 07:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/awful-links/dragonesslife.php livestock@somethingawful.com (Josh "Livestock" Boruff) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/skymall-spy-camera.php Works like a charm! Have accrued over 80 hours of video of a certain family dog dragging his buttocks on the carpet. Will be presenting this evidence in a kangaroo court in our living room. Open and shut case, family. A slam dunk for sure. This dog is guilty and going to doggy prison. Wed, 16 May 2012 00:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/skymall-spy-camera.php garbageday@somethingawful.com (Andrew "Garbage Day" Miller) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/comedy-goldmine/sarah-palin-smoker.php Let's go back to a simpler time, when people had values, and morals. Let's revisit the Palin Smoker. Tue, 15 May 2012 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/comedy-goldmine/sarah-palin-smoker.php lowtax@somethingawful.com (Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/feature-articles/diablo-3-livestream.php At work? Didn't get a copy of Diablo 3? Check out our official gameplay livestream! Tue, 15 May 2012 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/feature-articles/diablo-3-livestream.php davidthorpe@somethingawful.com (Dr. David Thorpe) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/loveless-reissue.php Your Band Sucks temporarily rises from the grave to examine the new reissue of Loveless, My Bloody Valentine's landmark album of mumbling and weird guitars. Spot every nuance of the remaster and listen like a pro! Tue, 15 May 2012 00:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/loveless-reissue.php zackparsons@somethingawful.com (Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/euphemisms-buying-consuming.php Get out your card, we have a collection of euphemisms used to describe various types of shopping. Mon, 14 May 2012 05:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/euphemisms-buying-consuming.php shmorky@somethingawful.com (HI I'M DAISY) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/flash-tub/princess-daisy-art.php Someone makes an oddly specific request for me to draw Princess Daisy... this cartoon happens! Sun, 13 May 2012 23:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/flash-tub/princess-daisy-art.php ianthegenius@hotmail.com (Martin R. "Vargo" Schneider and Joseph "Jay Dub" Wade) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/current-movie-reviews/dark-shadows-america.php Like his idol Nic Cage, Vargo runs around screaming about vampires. Sun, 13 May 2012 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/current-movie-reviews/dark-shadows-america.php salmonseason@somethingawful.com (Ian "Salmon Season" Golding) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/gross-icecream-restaurant.php Time to lower the # of complaints/reports of accidental food poisoning! Please Read ASAP! Sun, 13 May 2012 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/gross-icecream-restaurant.php ctstalker@somethingawful.com (Dennis "Corin Tucker's Stalker" Farrell) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/video-game-article/diablo-story-recap.php In which I recall the entire story of the Diablo series for your benefit, completely by memory. This will go well. Sat, 12 May 2012 00:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/video-game-article/diablo-story-recap.php ctstalker@somethingawful.com (Dennis "Corin Tucker's Stalker" Farrell) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/best-computer-user.php I was more than happy to keep this to myself. For years I conducted my operations in stealth mode, my talents known only by the select few who occupied the upper echelons of computer expertise. Then, as the internet grew exponentially, so did the hollow bragging from pretenders to the throne. Sat, 12 May 2012 00:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/best-computer-user.php zackparsons@somethingawful.com (Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/mitt-romney-cranbrook.php Mitt Romney was recently revealed as quite the prankster at Cranbrook School, but Romney can't remember those days. Here are a few more incidents he was involved in to refresh his memory. Fri, 11 May 2012 05:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/mitt-romney-cranbrook.php garbageday@somethingawful.com (Andrew "Garbage Day" Miller) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/photoshop-phriday/palin-smoker.php Play 'Palin Zone' on p 4! What an exciting game! Fantastic graphics! All your friends will want it! Fri, 11 May 2012 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/photoshop-phriday/palin-smoker.php hockey.johnston@yahoo.com (Levi "HOckey" Johnston) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/levi-johnston/obama-gay-marriage.php Levi talks baby names and comes to terms with his feelings about gay marriage. Thu, 10 May 2012 05:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/levi-johnston/obama-gay-marriage.php jedjed78@hotmail.com (Internet Writers Guild of America) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/internet-writing-registry.php For a small fee, the Internet Writers Guild of America Registry documents your authorship of a work, protecting it from potential plagiarism. (Note: due to recent market fluctuations, the IWGA no longer accepts payment in Bitcoins.) Thu, 10 May 2012 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/internet-writing-registry.php daryl.f.hall@gmail.com (Daryl "Fucking" Hall) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/awful-links/pua-hate-forum.php Wed, 09 May 2012 07:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/awful-links/pua-hate-forum.php livestock@somethingawful.com (Josh "Livestock" Boruff) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/time-travel-may.php Society member Herold caused a time loop that resulted in an endless NPR pledge drive. The source of the loop has been eliminated and the pledge drive should come to its natural conclusion in about three years. Wed, 09 May 2012 00:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/time-travel-may.php docevil@somethingawful.com (Jon "@fart" Hendren) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/twitter-tuesday/tt05-08-12.php The best tweets you probably haven't seen yet! Tue, 08 May 2012 07:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/twitter-tuesday/tt05-08-12.php docevil@somethingawful.com (Jon "@fart" Hendren) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/john-travolta-controversy.php A somewhat childish but provocative look at John Travolta's latest controversy. Tue, 08 May 2012 05:30:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/john-travolta-controversy.php garbageday@somethingawful.com (Andrew "Garbage Day" Miller) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/comedy-goldmine/combat-extraterrestrials.php SA's Paranormal/Conspiracy Forum asks: Do you have what it takes? Tue, 08 May 2012 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/comedy-goldmine/combat-extraterrestrials.php zackparsons@somethingawful.com (Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/growing-up-super.php Judy Blume meets Marvel as a teenage girl learns to deal with the difficulties of having a Ghost Rider for a father. Mon, 07 May 2012 03:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/growing-up-super.php shmorky@somethingawful.com (Shmorky) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/flash-tub/clipping-news-report.php Learn about the dangers of the latest viral trend: CLIPPING Sun, 06 May 2012 23:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/flash-tub/clipping-news-report.php ianthegenius@hotmail.com (Joseph "Jay Dub" Wade) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/current-movie-reviews/bully.php It's the Movie of the Week! Sun, 06 May 2012 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/current-movie-reviews/bully.php jedjed78@hotmail.com (Jedidiah "Jed" Kirchner) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/feature-articles/greatest-icings-history.php Remember 'icing'? Wikipedia defines it as a game that requires cunning, keen misdirection and flair. Sat, 05 May 2012 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/feature-articles/greatest-icings-history.php ctstalker@somethingawful.com (Dennis "Corin Tucker's Stalker" Farrell) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/mca-beastie-boys.php How in the world did they make the leap from Licensed To Ill to Paul's Boutique? It was insane. Like "barely able to touch the basketball rim on your first jump, then accidentally leaping into the sun on the next try" insane. Sat, 05 May 2012 00:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/mca-beastie-boys.php zackparsons@somethingawful.com (Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/skyrim-oblivion-mmo.php Word has leaked of an upcoming Elder Scrolls MMO. We have compiled all of the rumors about the game. Fri, 04 May 2012 04:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/skyrim-oblivion-mmo.php garbageday@somethingawful.com (Andrew "Garbage Day" Miller) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/photoshop-phriday/lcd-handheld-games.php All the finest licensed movie tie-ins and modern console mega-franchises, at your fingertips! Fri, 04 May 2012 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/photoshop-phriday/lcd-handheld-games.php zackparsons@somethingawful.com (Zack Parsons and Steve "Malak" Sumner) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/dungeons-and-dragons/return-gunt-barack.php Steve and Zack conclude the surprisingly uneventful journey of Nestor the Gunderman. Thu, 03 May 2012 05:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/dungeons-and-dragons/return-gunt-barack.php bobservo@somethingawful.com (Bob "BobServo" Mackey) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/mcdonalds-review-oboe.php Find out what all the buzz is about down at Mr. McDonald's restaurant. Thu, 03 May 2012 00:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/mcdonalds-review-oboe.php daryl.f.hall@gmail.com (Daryl "Fucking" Hall) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/awful-links/gabrielle-chana-crazygail.php Wed, 02 May 2012 13:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/awful-links/gabrielle-chana-crazygail.php livestock@somethingawful.com (Josh "Livestock" Boruff) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/skymall-neckpro-traction.php Love it. Makes me feel like gentle angels are reaching down and grabbing the base of my skull and pulling upward as if to remove my head from my body completely, only they don't and the disorienting euphoria that follows briefly frees me from my neck pain for a good 10-15 minutes. Wed, 02 May 2012 00:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/skymall-neckpro-traction.php garbageday@somethingawful.com (Andrew "Garbage Day" Miller) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/comedy-goldmine/very-angry-mouse.php Here's one shrew that CAN'T be tamed! Did I say shrew? I meant mouse, maybe. Oh no, now I've done it. It's about to have a fit. Tue, 01 May 2012 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/comedy-goldmine/very-angry-mouse.php davidthorpe@somethingawful.com (pdwxb-2909384717165@hous.craigslist.org) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/craigslist-roommate-ad.php Shower pressure is pretty good most of the time, but when your roomie flushes the toilet it gets a little drizzly. Theres only one bathroom, so we have sort of an open bathroom arrangement. I took the liberty of removing the lock from the door, so if we both need to pee at the same time, we can totally play swords LOL! Tue, 01 May 2012 00:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/craigslist-roommate-ad.php zackparsons@somethingawful.com (Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/god-plan-heist.php Whenever something goes wrong. Whenever tragedy strikes. Remember: God has a plan. To liberate $170 million from the High Roller vault in Las Vegas. Mon, 30 Apr 2012 05:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/god-plan-heist.php shmorky@somethingawful.com (TEAM ROCKHEAD) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/flash-tub/meowth-cartoon-finally.php Meowth GETS that Pikachu! FINALLY! Sun, 29 Apr 2012 23:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/flash-tub/meowth-cartoon-finally.php