Thu, 30 Sep 2010 06:00:00 +0000 During the tumultuous Jacquelinian era, no fabulist or faerie-tailor was more esteemed than Groggery Tirade "Grog" Gibbonman. en-us radium@somethingawful.com webmaster@somethingawful.com http://i.somethingawful.com/core/sa_logo_144.png 144 42 ian@fusedmuse.com (Ian "BFM" Helm) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/fables-groggery-gibbonman.php During the tumultuous Jacquelinian era, no fabulist or faerie-tailor was more esteemed than Groggery Tirade 'Grog' Gibbonman. From his famous home at 359 Fourthpenny Avenue, London, he penned more than 7,000 short morality tales in his lifetime, many of them wickedly scathing in their derision of ... something. Thu, 30 Sep 2010 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/fables-groggery-gibbonman.php ian@fusedmuse.com (Ian "BFM" Helm) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/groggery-gibbonman-littlebluehat.php "Oh dear!" said Little Blue Hat to the worm. "How is it that you know my name?" "Your actual name is 'Little Blue Hat?'" asked the worm with a dash of disbelief and a pinch of pity. "I can't say I expected that." He had no eyes to brow and thus no brows to arch, but certainly he did the best a worm could at it. Thu, 09 Dec 2010 01:00:00 -0600 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/groggery-gibbonman-littlebluehat.php ian@fusedmuse.com (Ian "BFM" Helm) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/groggery-rambunctious-rhymes.php Groggery Tirade "Grog" Gibbonman was hailed by his contemporaries as a master of poetic rhythm. Of particular note are his nursery rhymes, the first printed collection of which was presented to the young sons of Sultan Aleksivus III via messenger as an act of war. Tue, 22 Feb 2011 01:00:00 -0600 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/groggery-rambunctious-rhymes.php ian@fusedmuse.com (Ian "BFM" Helm) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/groggery-further-fables.php "Ahoy, good bees!" shouted the wolf to the bees' nest. "Your safety is much impaired, your lives at risk! For there is far too much honey in your nest! Though sweet, it is the culprit in your weighty danger! If you do not lighten your load, certainly you will lose it all to catastrophe!" The bees buzzed in shock at the wolf's claim. Thu, 26 May 2011 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/groggery-further-fables.php ian@fusedmuse.com (Ian "BFM" Helm) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/more-gibbonman-fables.php The cat traveled as far as he could walk, and when he came to the sea he swam. And when he tired of swimming he sank to the bottom of the sea, and there he met Neptune slumbering in his chamber. 'Oh mighty Neptune!' cried the cat, awakening the god. 'What marvels I have seen on my journey!' Thu, 09 Jun 2011 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/more-gibbonman-fables.php ian@fusedmuse.com (Ian "BFM" Helm) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/groggery-fireplace-lovecraft.php Of the many ghost stories penned by Groggery Gibbonman, surely none were better received than 'The Figure in the Fireplace,' a chilling verse first published in serialized form on the back of 'Sergio Cals Mystic Pastes of the Far East.' The hocus-pocus medicines ultimately proved unpopular due to radiation poisoning, but the hallowed rime remains! Thu, 13 Oct 2011 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/groggery-fireplace-lovecraft.php ian@fusedmuse.com (Ian "BFM" Helm) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/groggery-fox-king.php Why have you forgotten us? moaned the skeletons. They strained with ancient clatter. Let us die! Thu, 01 Mar 2012 01:00:00 -0600 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/groggery-fox-king.php ian@fusedmuse.com (Ian "BFM" Helm) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/groggery-gibbonman-fables.php "What trickery!" the butcher cried as he tore the makeshift Wanted: Apprentice sign down from its place. "I made no such sign! And if I had, then even so, a raccoon would make for no honest apprentice! "Then why do you hang that other sign?" asked the raccoon, and again he pointed. And there it was, a sign that read "Wanted: Raccoon Apprentice. Thu, 13 Sep 2012 01:00:00 -0500 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/groggery-gibbonman-fables.php ian@fusedmuse.com (Ian "BFM" Helm) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/groggery-gibbonman-giraffes.php Two giraffes, who as all traveled men know enjoy gazing at clouds, were engaging in their famous hobby one day when a particularly interesting specimen wafted into view. 'That cloud...' said the first giraffe, as he gestured toward the culprit in question.'that cloud is the emperor of clouds.' Wed, 06 Mar 2013 01:00:00 -0600 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/groggery-gibbonman-giraffes.php