Overview: I have to admit that I was hooked onto Radiohead since the first day the played back in March of 1997 at my college. I just sat there, bobbing my head to their incredible beats and wonderful melodies, and I wondered if anything could possibly beat this album. Well I picked up a copy of "Amnesiac" and... well, let's just say I wasn't too excited.

Produced By: Radiohead and Nigel Godrich.

The Pros: Tom York has a definite musical talent that has the ability to push him over the edge. Unfortunately, he's about 50,000 miles away from getting to that point. Right now he just kind of mumbles words and says things that don't make much sense

The Cons:Over-hyped. Simply put, over-hyped. There was not enough good material on this entire CD to make on B-side CD, much less an entire album. Tom, maybe you should regroup with one of your old bands and go back to you country-western style that you've always wanted to pursue.


Nice outfit, gents. You've got like a zillion dollars, why don;t you stop shopping at K-Mart?

As the long-awaited follow-up to Radiohead's widely successful "Kid A," "Amnesiac" has a lot to live up to. Unfortunately, this collection of twelve obviously hastily thrown together songs is not only dead on arrival, but also rotting on arrival and stinking up the whole music industry. These Irish rockers better spend more time in the studio and less time drinking and doing drugs, because if they're not careful they'll end up like Manila Vanilla.

Sure, fresh-from-rehab bandleader Tom York pumps out some nifty guitar work on tracks like "Pyramid Song" and "Life Spinning Plates," but the end result is an exercise in empty promises and obvious homage-bordering-on-complete-ripoff of techno powerhouses such as Aphex Twin and The Chemical Lab. Amateurish turntable work on tracks like "Push/Pull Revolving Doors" and "I might be wrong" really cheapen what could have been a bold techno/rock experience in the tradition of Confrontation Camp.

"You and Whose Army" is a shocking, borderline pop anthem that sounds like Ricky Martin crossed with Marylin Manson after biting the head off a bat. Sneering proclamations of physical superiority are pasted over various layers of jazz and industrial grindage. Look for the video on MTV!

Tom York tries to sing, but then again, Manila Vanilla tried to rap. Sometimes the best laid plans of mice and men go astray. And sometimes men get laid like mice in an ashtray. On purpose. Who filled that ashtray? Tom York. Bill Clinton may not have inhaled, but Tom York certainly did.

Radiohead was founded in the mid-1980's at the prestigious Oxford University, and the pretentiousness of the band still shines through loud and clear. Drummer Phil Selway needs to get himself a Segway and motor along at 17 miles per hour away from the band and go back to growing potatoes. Please, for the sake of the fans, eject this no-talent leech on society. I think he designed the cover to this album, which explains why it looks like a communist pop tart. How ironic, since it's sure to sweep the pop charts!

To be fair, there are a few bright spots: "Hunting Bears" and "Like a Glass House" feature clever tongue-twisters and the pulse-pounding drum work of John Greenwood (yes, son of Lee) meshing nicely to his brother Colin's work on bass. However, most of the songs on this album fail to make sense once you really listen to the lyrics. Check out this excerpt from "Knifes Out":

So knives out
Catch the mouse
Don't look down
Shove it in your mouse
If you'd been a dog
They would have drowned you at Perth

Huh? Why bother catching a mouse if you're going to just shove it into another mouse? While I'm a big supporter of recycling, forced rodent cannibalism makes no sense to me whatsoever. And what's with the mean-spirited jab at Australia out of nowhere? Hey, I understand Irish nationalism and all that (IRA), but keep your worldviews to yourself next time!

Another sample from "Life Spinning Plates," which is about the circus:

While you make pretty speeches,
I'm being put to bed.
You feed me to the lions,
a definite balance

Sure, why not lie down and take a nap while being fed to lions? Tom York has lied before about his drug addiction. Why stop there? A definite balance? Looks like somebody fell off the wagon!

One more complaint: Ed O'Brien sounds more like Ed McMahon on "Amnesiac," his whiny, pseudo-rapping barely managing to escape the thundering cavalcade of metal mayhem. We don't feel sorry for you and never have. Frat boys may enjoy this crap, but we fellow musicians sure don't!

Some how, some way, Radiohead has managed to pump out another over-hyped, over-wordy album even more unlistenable than the disaster that was "OK Computer." This is what happens when success goes straight to your head and into your fingertips. Not surprisingly, one of the tracks is entitled "Dollars and Sense." Looks like somebody forgot their roots…

If I were a bear, I'd describe "Amnesiac" as a bear trap: you're walking around, enjoying the music, and thinking everything's great and then… BOOM! Your leg is one big gash of blood and torn up shreds of flesh. What a bear wants is honey, not leg bones popping out of their ankles at weird angles. "Amnesiac" is not honey, it's a bear trap, which is exactly what the bear doesn't want. Winnie the Pooh loves honey, so he'd hate "Amnesiac." Maybe Tigger would like it, but Tigger likes Limp Bizkit. Do you like Limp Bizkit? Oh you do? Here's your bear trap, buddy!

After listening to "Amnesiac," you'll wish you'd catch Amnesia. That way you would lose your memory and still think Radiohead was a cool band.

Plot:3
Acting:2
Special Effects:4
Directing:6
Music / Sound:2
Overall:14

Each category in the rating system is based out of a possible 10 score (10 being the best). The overall score is based out of a possible 50 score (50 being the best).


Questions, comments? Send us an email to: TruthMedia Editor

– TruthMedia Editor

More Truth Media [Reviews]

This Week on Something Awful...

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.