If you've ever scooped out pumpkin innards, fingering me feels very similar- plus you can eat the "seeds".— Stacey Nightmare (@STACEYNIGHTMARE) October 20, 2012
How many bridges could a woodchuck burn if a woodchuck stopped returning emails&calls sorry I haven't been returning anyone's emails&calls.— shelby fero (@shelbyfero) October 15, 2012
a cool thing about having a lot of work to do is that i have a way to stay busy when no one calls on friday nights!— rap game glenna (@glenna_opt) October 19, 2012
How much longer do I have to see the Steve Jobs Tribute on the Apple page? If I wanted a constant reminder of death I'd call my mother.— Tess Rafferty (@TessRafferty) October 8, 2012
I'm not white enough to be excited for a new version of Windows.— Mike Drucker (@MikeDrucker) October 22, 2012
It is standard procedure for the White House to have a synthetic. But it sometimes malfunctions...
This VR game has become sentient and is killing us one by one. But is it art?
If you think Hitler was good, you've got another thing coming.
Everything worth reading from Twitter in one handy, horrible place!