I'll have you know, "sir", that some of my best posable action figures are black.— Eli Terry (@EliTerry) October 20, 2012
no i will not hold my horses that would be very heavy and dangerous not to mention buttercup has intimacy issues— Kaylee Harles (@Kalarlis) October 19, 2012
Apparently everyone at the beach is pretty laid back about peeing in the ocean until you stand on the shore to do it— Brandon McCarthy (@BMcCarthy32) October 22, 2012
Sorry strange one eyed man, I'm not letting you use my phone because you look faster than me— Stephen Wundar(@roscow) October 22, 2012
i'm trying to write jokes but all i keep thinking about is my new karate pig character named pork chop— lauren ashley bishop (@sbellelauren) October 22, 2012
What if you were a cop and the Skittle was mentally disturbed and wanted to be eaten?
DOPPELGANGER NEEDED - To minimize stress to my dog, I'm looking for somebody who is identical to me to take over ownership. Must also be able to fool my wife. Call to set up interview. 555-8252
I'll never forgive these giant alien insects! I'm trying!
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