Prison Talk

I don't know about you folks but if I were a woman I would definately not stay with a man who somehow got his dumbass into prison. But then again I don't have all the knowledge and wisdom that comes with being a complete fucking clueless moron.

There must be really something lacking in your life when you agree to marry a prison inmate, like self-esteem. You must really dislike yourself "Sam's girl". I don't blame you, I don't like you either!

Once you become gay it is against the law to go back. Google for "Plessy Vs. Fergeson" to read all about it.

I thought it was a waste of time playing Ralisport Challenge 2 for two hours. But then I discovered this person who enjoys talking about what she wears to visit her husband in jail and the prison vending machines. Wow.

When you have nothing in life you just start making shit up.

Aw... poor criminal.

Well, the problem here is that your life is pretty much the same for you whether you're in jail or not.

More The Weekend Web

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Lair Flair!

    Lair Flair!

    Your lair. Maybe you lure victims to it, maybe you hide in it between killings, or maybe you haunt it 24/7 because you’re tragically confined by a curse. Whatever the situation, for most of us monsters, a living/un-living space is an important part of our identities. In this column, Monstergeddon award winners share their lair tips and techniques!

  • SkyMall Product Review: Bark Deterring Ultrasonic Collar

    SkyMall Product Review: Bark Deterring Ultrasonic Collar

    Works great on my child, who hasn't barked at all for as long as she's worn the apparatus. When she turns three, we will remove it for a trial period.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.