By now I think it's a well known fact that teenagers don't know shit about anything on the planet, especially about sex.
Eeeww, that makes it double gross!
"Mom Thinks I'm Gay's" is so light in his loafers he can counteract gravity.
It means you should stop storing your car keys in your vagina.
Dear 18 And Testicles Have Not Dropped, Penis Small & Thin,
I could have sworn Teddy Ruxpin was gay.
Make like a tree and let some weird kid molest you!
I hope "1 inch College Boy" finds whatever he's looking for. (Probably a magnifying glass.)
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
Expendable? You must be joking.
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