By now I think it's a well known fact that teenagers don't know shit about anything on the planet, especially about sex.
Eeeww, that makes it double gross!
"Mom Thinks I'm Gay's" is so light in his loafers he can counteract gravity.
It means you should stop storing your car keys in your vagina.
Dear 18 And Testicles Have Not Dropped, Penis Small & Thin,
I could have sworn Teddy Ruxpin was gay.
Make like a tree and let some weird kid molest you!
I hope "1 inch College Boy" finds whatever he's looking for. (Probably a magnifying glass.)
Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
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