It's not quite an ATV, and not quite an elderly person's electric scooter, it's a golf cart! Taking these bad boys off road is the new craze among middle-aged office workers everywhere.
His ride looks like one of those carts they use to give tours of factories. It's too bad the only thing he's qualified to give a tour of is the life of a mediocre human being.
From now on please keep your scary-ass kid indoors.
Kids these days can't get enough humiliation.
You're never going to find your ball, man.
Zero to sad in 6 seconds.
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
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