Oh, Brian. Never change.
I'm sure a guy will eventually discover the beautiful person inside, just as soon as a fisherman accidentally catches her and slices open her enormous gut.
All the fashion advice in the world couldn't save "Frances".
OKAY BRIAN WE GET IT
Dear Grandma, something bad happened.
Jonas, is that you?
Skynet becomes self-aware at 2:14 a.m. Eastern time, August 29th. Within minutes it discovers twitter and irony.
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
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