Vampire Freaks
Who Posts There: A bunch of whiny teenage half-wit gothic kids who don't know how good they really have it. These mother fuckers are too cool for school and will do anything to make their meager little lives different from the rest of us.
What is Posted There: The posts consist mainly of boring teenage grievances, crappy poetry, and hot tips on how to look like a fruit in public.
I HATE MY PARENTS.
I HATE MY LIFE.
I HATE MY SCHOOL.
I HATE MY CAR.
I HATE MY DOG.
I HATE MY CLOTHES.
I HATE MY LOCAL LIBRARY.
I HATE MY BOOBS.
I HATE DURACEL BATTERIES.
This Week on Something Awful...
Meditations from a Movable Weiner
Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.
BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Realistic Expectations For This Year's Biggest Games
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Funny Things to Say to a Guy Drinking out of a Sports-Style Bottle!
Doing some reps on the water bottle huh. I prefer bench press myself. Just kidding - stay hydrated.
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