Extensive studies and scientific proof concludes that Eminem is a "nigga"! This is even more Earth-shattering than the discovery of that whole "big bang" thingy!

Eminem has touched the lives of so many people in so many different ways. For example, he helped this fatty lose "13 kilos." I don't know where those kilos went, but I'm assuming it was somewhere erotic.

Decode the following post and win a date with "limpbizkit rules."

Hey good news! Eminem is getting married! Hey bad news! It's to Internet forum poster "betz," whom I suspect has had her brain damaged extensively! Oh, and more bad news: the marriage is being contested by an anonymous fan.

Wait, people actually try to score HIGHLY on an "emo test"? What is the test, just a question reading "are you a pretentious crying fuckwit?"

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