This week on Unsolved Mysteries!
I usually just freeze my semen and make sperm popsicles.
"me" is just bragging.
"dazedandamused" is about to break.
What a surprise! We have a special guest for you guys today! It's "shoez" from our very own Something Awful Forums!
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.