Greetings mortals. I am Chris Vanderberg, your unholy guide through the bowels of the sick, twisted, perverse stain of the Information Age we live in. It will be my pleasure to serve to your pathetic, uneducated, conformist minds the most high quality of electronics and electronic goods. If you have any obvious questions, please email me.

- Chris Vanderberg
Undertaker of the Mortal Realm

"The Goth Shop - Now with 239% more pasty-white angst"

Item: 3958A-492

Weller 921ZX1 Professional Soldering Station

Features:

  • Controls and aids in the creation of soulless, mechanical, electronic monstrosities that answer to no god.
  • Lightweight hand piece allows one to wield this item like a deadly surgical instrument of death.
  • Small footprint ensures it will take up less benchspace, which you can use to lay down upon and call to the Lord of Chaos, summoning an unholy spawn of pure rage.
  • UL listed.

Sale: $69.99

Item: 27242-928

RCA 5" Color TV

You stupid, ignorant sheep. Your TV is your god. You bow to NBC, CBS, and ABC. You blindly follow whatever they say and purchase whatever image you are fed through this digital box of futility. Your ignorant, close-minded brain cannot comprehend the world around you, and you are simply a mindless drone wading through a sea of directionless filth. Requires 9 "D" batteries.

Sale: $319.99

Item: 19212GG-29

Samsung DC-203 Dome Camera

Features:

  • Provides yet another way to let the all-seeing eye of Big Brother into your home or business.
  • Circular, domelike case reminds us that Jesus is a lie.
  • Female RCA plug will let you assert your manliness by shoving your disgusting male cable into it.
  • Cannot pick up / record vampires.

Sale: $206.66 (on sale)

Item: 38263-20

AT&T Translucent Blue Headset Cordless Phone

You weak, struggling human shell.
Born to walk this living hell.
You may think you're tough, think you're cool,
But I shall have the last laugh you fool.
Hitting me in gym class, making me trip and fall.
Your blood shall spill through this very hall.
For the Dark Master Satan is on his way,
with a message that will make you pay.
You see, I will not stand for any more of your berating.
This cordless phone comes with call waiting.

Sale: $59.99


Employee of the Month:

Sarah Johann

Sarah helped close a deal with Panasonic, allowing us to begin carrying the line of disgustingly plastic D5 portable TVs. Now, when you're wandering aimlessly throughout the empty and bleak desolated streets of America's capitalistic society of money-grubbing whores, you can thank Sarah for the low, low prices that you can't get anywhere else but The Goth Shop.

Sarah's quote: "I myself am a God and bow to no christian impostor. Jesus was a lie. The seven-headed fire breathing dragon shall return on November 11th, 2001, and all the capitalistic zombies shall be engulfed in a fiery inferno that YOU have created. America is a society built on greed and despise."

We accept Visa, Mastercard, and American Express. Please no checks or cash.


Questions? Comments? Email the Lord of Darkness!