WATS UP ITS JEFF K ADN IM BACK WIT A HIP HOPPEN FUCKY FRESH REVIEWS OF A GAEM FOR YUO TOO FEASTS YOUR EYES ON LIEK A PRIZE!!!!!
helo it has been a log LONG TIEM sence I haev updated my webpaeg with qualiety informatian about games and BUSTEN CAPS IN A NIGGAS ASS hahaahahahahaha becuase I was in jail serving hard tiem for a bustah!!!!! hahahaha just kidding I haev been studdying a long tiem because of BECUASE I AM BECOMEING STREET SMART SO I CAN WORK AT SONY MAKEING EVARQUEST GAMES ABOUT ELF TRAINS. Jerrys mom had a heart atack becuase shes a fat sow and her son inhales porridge for a dead man's hand on a summar's eve so she had a heart atack when her heart says "NO MORE!!!" LIEK IN TAHT MOVIE WITH JENNIFER LOPEZ WHERE SHE WAS STUCK ON TEH CEILING AND BEAT HER HUSBAN TO DEATH FOR BEING A MIGHTY GOOD MAN!!! so jeery and I had to goes to teh hospital to see her and bring her a beautifull bouquet of memories FIT FOR A KING. she is betar now but who knows if her haert will get fat and explodes again I dont and Im a doctor hahahahhaa I am just kiding I am not a doctar I am a lover
BJ BALACKWITZ SI GHOSTFACE KILLAH!!!!
ANYWAY JERry and I figared out how to overcalock his playstatian 2 to get expanded local cabal services and now we are playaing GRAD THEFT AUTO: SAN ADVERSAS ON IT!!! We downloaded teh game useing THE PHANTOM CONSOUL SERVICES FOR A WHOPING $9.95 A MOTH PLUS SERVICE FESS ADN LOCAL TAXES MAY APPLY CONSULT A DEALAR FOR CASH BACK BONUESE . teh Phantom lets yuos download teh hottaast games such as Marbal Madness 2004 and Pregnant Mom Boxeing Pagent 9: Hell on Wheels witch si a good deal no mattar how yuo look at it. also I downladed my garage door openar so now teh worald si my oyaster and jerry can finally shut up next tiem his cat Muffin chasses a pesky rodent up my alleyway. the phantom game console has a hemi too, but engugh about taht, now I am will here to talks about Grad Theft Auto: My Son Andre.
THIS GAME IS ABOUT RAP MUSIC
GRAD THEFT AUTO WAS oops I mean GRAD THEFT AUTO: SAN ANDERAS was programed by teh people who made soem othar games about car carashes and guns what games were those I dont know but anyway it si a sequal to a gaem rich with blood and beauty. GTA:SA maeks triumphat leaps in teh prograss of mankind by makeing there game about BLACK GUYS becuase most games are normaley about WHITE WOMEN WITH BIG TITS WHO HAEV A SWORD AND SHOTS HOBBITS. there are no hobbitts in GTA:AS and teh only white women can be kiled by running over with a car yuo can runs them ovar. WITH A CAR!!! or a boat I guess but I dont know I'm not teh president of teh game companey or whatevar so I dont know evarything bub. I want to run ovar white women with a car butt I dont haev a drivars lisense boo hoo I guess I will just have to hit them with fists instead.
IN thes fien game yuo palay teh charactar of BJ Balascowitz a hardcoar gangasta tru lyfe thugg OG skool marm hip hop OBGYN back from da ghetto into a prison WAIT I MEAN HE SI BACK FROM PRISON WITH A GRUDGE AND A CHIP ON HIS SHOULDAR LIEK THIRD BASS!!! his mom died so he has to coem back too town liek jerry but unliek jerry hes not fat and smells like a wet bank vault. yuo come back from da prison lyfe and see yuor homies and they say "HAY BJ WAS UP DOOD" and yuo say "SUP YALL FUNKY FRESH FAT FLY" and teh says "YEAH DATS WAT IM TALKIN BOUT" and yuo says "SMASH MAH FIZZY" "SILVERFISH" and tehy says "MESSY GON HIT CHOO UP YO" and then its a fast tiem for flying fists and yuod bettar duck Because teh hood si a wintar wondarland with bullits.
teh rest of teh gaem si abouts hanging with Mistar Coopar and shots teh guns at mailboxes liek in Paparboy or 720. WATCH OUT FOR TEH BEES!!! I HATE BEES!!! Jerry once tried to eat an entire beehive but had too stop becuase it feel into a pond near a cow and Jerry si afraid of cows evar since teh time we went to teh milkfarm for 6th grade field trip and the cow peed on his shoe and Mr. Denning said "GOSH DAMNIT JERRY WHO PISSED ON YUOR SHOE IT SMELLS LIEK A COW" and teh terriabable truth was too much to bear so Jerry ran away crying and hid behind a stack of hay until teh sun went down and his dad called teh cops on teh school for misappropriation of funds.
tehere are maney diffarent plots of FDA:SA and hear are soem of teh missians I have palayed so far:
MISSIAN #1: RIDE A BIKE ADN DONT GET SHOT BY PIMPS IN A PINK CAR WFT PINK CAR LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MISSIAN #2: GET A TATTOO OF UWE BOLL ON YOUR RIGHT ARM
MISSAIN #3: WORK OUT IN A GYM LIFTING WAIGHTS UNTIL A BUTTON SAYS "PRESS THIS BUTTON" AND YUO DO SO IT DOES PRESES THAT BUTTON ITS OVER NOW WELCOEM TO FLAVOR COUNTRY
MISSAIN #4: DRIVE TO GET A CHICKEN BUCKET AND SMOEK A BLUNT WATCH out for cops and witches
MISSIAN #4: PRANK CALL 40 PHOEN NUMBARS IN UNDER 40 SECONDS
MISSIAN #5: DISCOVER TEH MYSTARY OF TEH PYRAMIDS
MISSIAN #6: DRIVEBY SHOTTING OF REVENGE FOR LOVE LOST
MISSIAN #7: STEAL A CAR NO WAIT SPRAY PAINT A WALL SO IT SAYS "THE LOST BOYS RULE" ON IT
MISSIAN #8: STEAL A CAR
MISSIAN #9: intermission
MISSIAN #10: I DIDANT GET TO MISSIAN #10 BECUASE JERRY'S FAT WAS BLOCKING TEH TELEVISIAN
yuor gang of teh Los Santa Grove City Families is to reclaim Los Santa in teh name of Grover Cities for yuor gang. there are rival gangs yuo must defeats liek teh ballers (BALLS LOL), the Vagros, and Aztecs who invented teh time machene and circuit city witch si filthy dump no mattar how you look at it. also there are cops but they are not in a gang unless you say teh cops ARE A GANG and they rough up yuor possie with evil white man antics such as intimidatian and bully force. teh police are racists against yuo just because yuo are a freedom loving balack man framed for running ovar people when yuo were trying to shoot them to death with guns.
OG STANDS FOR "OG"!!!!!!
Jerry tried palaying thes game once and he kept saying "WHAT" when teh charactars started speaking becuase Jerry dose not undarstand hood getto speeach liek I do because I palay Maddan 2004 over a Xbox Life so I know how to talk street samart. When my possie says "YO WHADDUP IN YA PANTALOONS, G" I was liek "YUO FRONTIN HOMES" and jerry started crying becuase he was beat up by a african amamrican in 8th grade when the guy thought jerry was looking at his tater tots in teh bathroom hAHahHAHAHAHA!!! JERYY SI NOT AS COOL AS MY BOO
one of teh most incradibal featares of thes game si teh abilitie to go evarywhere and do evarything all from teh comfort of yuor own home! yuo can be on all kinds of crazzey missians and do crazzy things like this is what I did last night:
my charactar was workeing in a bakery when I picked up a phoen and teh president was on teh phone and saids "GO TO GET YOUR HAIR CLEANED" so I said "YES SIR MR PRESIDENT SIR" I MEAN I SAID "YO HOMES WHAS SUP WIT CHOO BITCH" and then I left. I stole a CORVETTE CAR outside and drove it into a flying buttress.then a hookar caem out and said "I'LL DUST YOUR CHIMNEY FOR $50" SO IS SADIS I SAID "OKEY BITCH" and that was taht THERE IS A BUG ON MY INTERNET
then I stole a motarcycal and took it to get spray painted, I got flames sprayed on teh side of it and I changed the license plate to say "2CRUDEDUDES" and drove it into a flying buttress
then the president came out of a TV and said "GOOD JOB JEFF K" and I said "YO BITCH SLAP ME SOME SKIN" and a pact was made between brothers! then I made $5000 driving kids to school in a schoolbus ever though school si for fagots hahahahahahahahahhaa I DONT HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL ANYMOER BECUASE I AM HOME SCHOOLERED!!! TAHTS RIGHT NO MORE HISTORY CLASS TOUGHT BY MISS PARKER YOU SCARECROW HORNET FAT BAT CAT FLOOZIE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHHHHAHAHAH PS WHAT SI A FLYIGN BUTRESS ANYWAYS
so in summary thies si a vary good gaem and yuo shoulds buys it ASAP or else I'll gonna bust a cat in yo ass hhahaha no I'm just kidding I do not shoots unless I have a dessert eagal in my pants lagmo hello ladies HOW ABOU T A DATE WITH JEFF K, I'VE GOT PLASTAR IN MY EYES
REVIEW SCORE BY JEFF K TOO:
GAME: 10 /10
GAME IS FOR XBOX: XBOX SI FOR FAGOTS WFT SI A XBOX ANYWAY BILL GATES, I'M NOT MADE OUT OF MONEY LIEK YUO SO I CANT BUY A GAME MACHENE SYSTEM WITH TEH KING'S JEWALS IN TEH CONTROLLARS THANK YUO VARY MUCH ASS
by jeff K!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <----- YO WAS UP CLICK HEAR FOR MY HOEMPAGE!!!!!