Amanda Gatsby. As you can tell from the photo, that marble unicorn is the only thing capable of being horny within a 500-mile radius of her butter-filled bag of a body.

Count Crotchula casts the horrible spell of "DRIFTING EYEBALL +23" against the Goth Minivan of Terror!

Mike Melvinson. I can't remember if this photo was taken after or before I tossed his ugly skull into the deep fryer at Wendy's. I guess it doesn't really matter.

Some malformed lump of white trash attempts to muscle up so he can defend his trailer park from the Wrath of Yablonski. No dice there, Captain Crapshoot.

Emperor Lumpy welcomes you to the East Appleton Homemade Mayonnaise Making Festival. Short and stubby fingers like his often fuck up my weedwacker when I'm taking the liberty of making his body less morally offensive.