Hey look, it's the inspiration for "Aliens." Nice smile there Captain Carnivore.

South Appleton Community College lust. I lust for the day the cops find the heads of these two twinkie fuckshits crammed inside the tampon dispenser in the Arby's men's bathroom. Yes, there's a fucking tampon dispenser inside the men's room. I don't know why they put that in there or why they fucking switched the men's and women's bathroom signs on the doors either, or why the women were suddenly using the wrong fucking bathroom, but they were and that's what I told the manager before demanding a free coffee.

"IT HURTS"

Amanda Calica squeezes an entire sofa out of her bloated butt. Her little sister, Troll-In-Training, tries to push out a pillow. Don't buy furniture in this town.

Well isn't this just fucking wonderful.