God I hate hippies. Mark Baldinger's house is like a fucking jungle thanks to all his drug plants he grows so he can put them in that huge drug bong he's using. In this picture, he's smoking geranium!

PHOTOGRAPHER: "Okay ladies, now take off the masks and I'll get a serious picture of you two."

GNOME #1: "GREEEEAAR!" (TRANSLATED FROM GNOME LANGUAGE: "We're not wearing masks!")

PHOTOGRAPHER: "There is no God."

Welcome to Club White Trash. This is Mindy demonstrating how much liquor it will take for any of the bar patrons to sleep with her. Not me though, I drink more than that for breakfast, you sissies.

Earl Fleming, the bouncer at Club White Trash. Earl was beaten by the ugly stick so much when he was a kid, he now owns the exclusive rights to it.

Yeah, go with the hat. It draws attention away from your misshapen face.

Notice the wires going up his butt? This is because Mitch Kenyaka is a cyborg! Every time he farts, the CDROM opens. What a crazy shithead!