SHOEBERT

GAME REVIEW: F>E>A>R>

GUMSHOEthis game si supposed to be scarrey! maybe it is scarrey to yuo if you are afraid of warehouses and boxes evarywhere! OH GOSH, LOOK AT ALL THESE BOXES AND WEARHOUSES WHAT A HALL OF HORRORS!!! I spent eight hours palaying this game and Im still shooting through wearhoses with boxes against soldiar men so wow thats pretty scarrey! Jerry is afraid of wearehouses becuase we snuck out one day and got a ride with Michale to teh hunted houses downtown where renissance festival art students wrok at and I guess thats really scarrey if yuo are afraid of 22 year old fat guys who say HUZZAH a lot

anyway there was a guy in a devil costume and his gut hung out over his pants and Jerry saw him and ran away but there was a tall man behind him and jerry hit the mans crotch with his face and oh man I laughed myself into a fancyfull fit I tell you WHAT A HALLOWWEEN!!!

in F>E>AR> yuo fight army men and then yuo open a door and see a ghost and a littal girl from teh ring., I guess thats the scarrey part becauyse if your killing 5000 men in a warehouse full of boxes teh last thin yuo expect to see is a littal girl!!! WELL GEE LETS SEE HEAR I CAN HANDAL KILLING A MILLION ARMY DUDES BUT BOY CERTAINELY NOBODY CAN EXPECT ME TO WATCH A LITTAL GIRL WITH BLACK HAIR!!! thats scarrey and once again we have Japan to balame for this incredibal trend of littal girls with balack hair = scarryness. THANKS JAPAN HERE IS A WREATH COMPOSED OF ABORDED BABIE FETUSES FOR YUOR TIME AND EFFORT!

 

"F.E.A.R" STANDs FOR

FEAR

EAR

AR

RAR

wehn I baught this game from Gamespot teh man behind the countar said "OH MAN THIS GAME SI SOOOOOOOO SCARREY!!! I WAS SCREAMING FOR A WET NAP WHEN I PALAYED IT!!!! PLAY IT TONIGHT WITH TEH LIGHTS OFF YUO WILL SCREAM!!!" and I saids "I WILL SCREAM IF YUO DONT SHUT UP POSTURE KING!" and bam I gots teh game and surprise it wasant scarrey at all!!! just like Doom 3 evarybody said thsi game will scare yuo off your britches adn yuo will develope a crippaling drug habbit immediately aftarwards but guess what it wasant scarrey at all unlike Jerrys malformed cretin face.

UGH WHAT ASCARE
A SCRENSHOT FROM F>E>AR> WHAT A SCARREY GAME HOLD ON TO YUOR HATS GENTALMEN!!! OH GORSH IM SO SCARRED OF TEH RING YUO HAVE 7 DAYS TO LIVE SMANTHA

WHY AARE ALL VIDEO GAME REVIEWARS SUCH WUSSY FAGOTS! they are all scarred of dumb crap and write reviews liek "this game was soooooo scarrey that I bought a Big Gulp and threw it into teh air when this monstar jumped out of a cupboard to scare me with its tactics now I need a new livar because mine is on fire thanks to such a frighteneing scare!!! I CANNOT BELIEF WHAT I SEE!!" this game si not scarrey but its scarrey to think how much it would cost to buy a new computar that runs it fastar than a crippaled hangman

also the fgact monolith entartainment is still in buinsness is scarrey too

EDITAR"S NOTE: THIS GAME HAS EXPLODEING BARRELS IN IT (EVARY GAME MADE AFTER 1995 HAS EXPLOADING BARRALS IN IT APPARANTLY)

overall rating:

out of stars

the END!!!!!!!!!!!! PS CLICK HEAR TO VISIT MY HOMEPAGE OF SOME SORT

THAT SI IT TEH END OF MY REVIEWS CLICK HEAR TO VISSIT MY HOMEPAEG WHITCH I WILL NOT UPDATE FOR ANOTHAR 40 YEARS HAHAHAHAHA I HATE TEH INTARNET THANKS FOR NOTHING

woah where did this text coem from I hate dreamweasal allot!

hahahahaaaa