these enhance gameplay alright.
Cyber Arena is pretty much what I expected from a map
with the word "Cyber" in the title - pretty
damn awful. Who the hell uses the word "cyber"
that's not a total idiot? Anybody that says "cyberspace"
around me gets a cup of steaming urine thrown in their
The text file description for this deathmatch gem claims
it was designed for "GL Cards, like with Diamond
Monster 3D (Voodoo 3Dfx)" or else "level ill
look plain indeed". I find this interesting, because
I don't think even the most powerful graphics workstation
could make this map look anything better than "retina
scarring awful." Having made six other maps for
Duke Nukem, the author claims he left off "thrills"
like teleporters and doors because they "mess up
the game flow". Somebody should inform the author
that having to wait for your eyesight to adjust after
entering every single room messes up game play as well.
Unless, of course, the game is "let's give Quake
players a huge fucking headache", in which case
the author succeeds with flying colors (haha, "flying
colors"! Get it?).
MAP: As mentioned before, this map is a good friend
to colored lighting. Every room has a distinct personality,
which can be summed up as either "red, green, or
blue." These colors add a lot to the game, things
that probably couldn't be achieved without physically
beating the guy playing the map with a bag of doorknobs.
The author has
It's the green room!
to stick with the popular shitty mapping theme, "a
bunch of small rooms connected by hallways." These
rooms are in no order and seem to be placed in random
locations, perhaps after the author lost a bet. Textures
are misaligned and ones that were not meant to be repeated
on a single surface are. Of course there's the obligatory
lava on the map, as the author must've felt pity for
me playtesting this map and wanted an easy way to commit
suicide. Most of this map appears to have been created
while the author was sniffing glue, as nobody in their
right mind could want to play deathmatch in this colored
What gameplay? After showing screenshots of this thing
to other people, I couldn't pay anybody to jump on a
server with this running.
FACTOR: Surprisingly little, unless you hate your
eyesight or are trying to fail a military physical.
BOTTOM LINE: It's a fantastic map if you're turned
on by poor gameplay, bad room flow, awful texture placement,
lighting that should be illegal, and weapon placement
that seems to follow no logical thought.
ratings go from 0 (bearable) to -10 (painfully terrible).
Total score goes from 0 (ok) to -50 (the worst piece
of shit you'll ever play).