The valor pigs have been looking over your uniform and trying to find fault. Time to show them how army is done!
You said to submit t-shirt ideas to this e-mail address, so here are some I have come up with.
It's the most sought-after toy on the market, but is the NES Mini Classic acceptable for kids? Our experts emphatically say no. All 30 of the system's included games feature scenes that are completely inappropriate for children.
Amazing deals from an adorable criminal.
This ain't your grandpappy's Young Pope. This is the new Techno Pope.
If you don't enter our stores with a gun full of bullets and a brain full of unhinged questions, we'll serve you with a smile.
"Hey jackass! Here's a free tip: When you donate a bunch of new toys to charity, take the store tags off!"
Important techniques for anyone returning from an extended vacation.
Rate and subscribe, you cucks!
Some people claim Trump's rise will bring back comedy or punk rock. Wrong! He's bringing back prog rock, baby!
Stay 'woke' on the best treatments for chronic sleeplessness.
Finally! An alternative to family!
I didn't order extra SJW agenda on this pizza. I didn't order this pizza either. They won't let me out and I have to review them.
New additions to our favorite collection of plastic freaks.
Is there mode to look at models closer? Much closer?
There is only one thing that can bring us back together: another copy-cat food delivery service that promises $10 off your first delivery with the promo code "fr33f00d."
Christmas is right around the corner and you know what that means: time to pick out the perfect book of memes for that special someone in your life who will most definitely not immediately sever all contact with you after receiving such a gift.
You morons blew it and you're going to suffer. So you'd better learn your lesson and vote for me.
Putting a computer together is easier and more fun than you might think. It's sort of like building a LEGO set. It also costs about as much as a LEGO set.
Liberals have once again used the media to attack Trump. We have the leaked script for Rogue One that exposes all of their vile lies.
All the amazing predictions from The Simpsons that finally came true in 2016.
This is very real. As an insider I possess damning evidence that could utterly destroy Something Awful. This website has many enemies who appear to be coming to power in the United States. They probably have lots of money at their disposal, and I could really use some.
Don't let the winter dryness destroy your sinuses.
Donald Trump is constantly being compared to infamous political figures and villains from movies. Finally, the correct comparison is here.
Now that Bob Dylan has won the Nobel Prize in literature, hopefully these other great musicians will win the award in the future.
By the time I finished inflating this thing, I was too tired to use it. This is just like real dates. Women wear you down making you jump through so many hoops, then you are simply too exhausted and sad to continue. The pump should be free.
Wow, so many drink shops to choose from!
President-elect Trump needs to make some tough choices about the swords his key advisers will wield.
Guess who's coming to Thanksgiving dinner: A literal Nazi.
Which was your favorite stand up special of 2016: "Trigger Warning: No Participation Trophies" or "Sheesh, When Did Everyone Get So Sensitive"?
Just because your teeth are made of Wolverine’s adamantium doesn't mean that anyone cares.
A comprehensive review of the latest game in the Pokémon series. STORE or TOSS? Read on to find out!
I've got terrible news for you idiots. You're all going to lose your jobs. Your children are going to starve and die slowly in front of your eyes. Your whole world is going to end. If half of you make it through the day without committing suicide, I'd be shocked.
My write-in president's gonna make a monkey outta you!
We have all the excellent beers for you to begrudgingly choke down!
In any given day you are required to think about several things, if not dozens of things. How can that happen when every synapse is dedicated to processing the reality of our garbage world again and again, as if running it all through your mental calculator will uncover a different result?
This is the first Dishonored 2 review on the internet. How do I know that? It's not out until Friday. Bethesda is no longer providing the press with review codes ahead of release. Heck, I don't even have the game.
Don't go to the polls today without consulting our guide for voters who pretty much want to die.