That atheist professor should have kept his mouth shut around this American Sniper.
The Cartoon Kingdom is restless. At its heart, a mad tyrant.
If you live in north America or Europe, the New Nintendo 3DS (not to be confused with the Nintendo 3DS, Nintendo 2DS, Nintendo 3DS U, or Nokia N-Gage) will not come with an AC adapter. I'm pretty sure that means you won't be able to charge the internal battery unless you rub the system against a power outlet for a few days and hope for the best.
What if SparkNotes were written by the people who need to read SparkNotes? It's here.
6-year-old Hunter died and went to heaven. It just wasn't the heaven he was expecting.
Time to say goodbye to suburban and city clutter and move out to an unzoned property with just me, my dog, and a selection of adult magazines in special compartments.
Brooklyn was once a hotbed of gang violence, with groups like the Pure Hells, Satan Souls and Screaming Phantoms carving out their turf. The borough has gotten a bit safer over the years, but many dangerous gangs are still at large.
I heard you have a new baby at home. This must be such an exciting, emotional time for you. I have to ask, though, what is a baby?
The conservative town of Bomont is about to get slightly more conservative as the Nigerian terrorists invade.
With the help of the Internet, we offer our solemn tribute to the heroes of Charlie Hebdo who were brutally killed in Paris. Je Suis Charlie.
Everything you need to know about your favorite hardcore German board game.
Jupiter Ascending asks: What if one of the lesser Star Wars movies had the visual design of the Underworld series?
Ten amazing tricks to finding the season's hottest nerd trinkets. [100% confirmed] [Uncle works at Nintendo]
Shutter Island? More like open workgroup! We have devised a new floor plan for the office based on 19th century insane asylums.
An early draft of the KMFDM song "Megalomaniacal" reveals a much more extensive list of interesting groups of people.
You can use abilities and skills to win a video game. I recommend it! Here's a handy visual guide to the skills in Dragon Age: Inquisition. Push the button that does them and you'll win faster.
"Meat. All types of meat. Gravies, too. Every kind of gravy. Meats with gravies. Broth, pure unfiltered broth. Every meat in my mouth right now, gravy oozing out." -Champ
The new widescreen HD remaster of The Wire sounded like a safe bet, given series creator David Simon's close involvement with the conversion. Did you catch last weekend's marathon? Some of the changes struck me as odd, but I want to run them by you guys to make sure I'm not overreacting.
What do you see in your year in review? A tragedy? A vacation? Strange and terrifying things? Yes!
Time magazine wanted to eliminate a few words. We have a better idea and these words have got to go in 2015.
The 17-century battle between Santa Claus and Satan reaches an unfortunate peak.
The unSlender Man is a humanoid male with a rotund belly and jocular disposition. He is described as wearing a red suit with white trim and a matching hat. While it is rare to catch a glimpse of the unSlender Man, victims say his footprints in the snow are visible for days after his visits. Thats right, you guessed it- idts the big man Santa Claus.
We get it. Diligence and/or consideration aren't your strong suits.
The 2014 Steam Holiday Sale is upon us! Find out which games you will buy this year and absolutely never play.
Mothers, Danzig warned you in general terms about his nefarious intentions. Now find out what he specifically intends.
Makes baby look too appetizing. Also I have my thigh stuck in one and I can't get it off. It's so tight around the skin I can't cut it without risking injury. IT'S A LONG STORY AND IT'S NONE OF YOUR BEESWAX.
Starting a company is difficult for anyone - doubly so if you happen to be a monster. Make the most of your unique situation with a clever business name to catch the customer's eye.
Jump Street stars and infamous emailers Channing Tatum and Jonah Hill review some of the biggest movies in theaters now.
We have an exclusive leak of twelve more Star Wars character cards from The Force Awakens!
One CIA operative finds fault with his colleague's whimsical version of enhanced interrogation.
Scientists have identified many issues with the Monty Hall Problem, such as the fact that even after taking the best choice, there's still a chance you might lose. Some scientists have also criticised the Monty Hall problem after successfully solving it, and then being told that the prize was made up.
Step One: Be a total asshole
Discovery's special featuring naturalist Paul Risolie donning a suit of rejected Halo armor and being very slightly "eaten" by a python needs to become a series.
Surrendering to police can be dangerous for black men. These tips might just save a life.
The unexamined life is not worth living, which is why it's important to live your life in front of a webcam, where it can be examined by hundreds of lonely men. But like any fine art, camming has its do's and don'ts.
All these idiot women saying we are misogynists need to get a clue. #GulperGate is about protecting something precious and important: the flow of water. This is once again the actions of a radical feminist pushing her standards on the local drinking fountain community, which by pure coincidence, is made up entirely of single men.
The first Matrix film didn't expand my worldview. It established my worldview. The Matrix introduced concepts I had never thought about before: Reality, computers, religion, social issues.
If you're looking for a Cyber Monday bargain, and you're a weirdo, you can't do better than these fantastic deals.
In case you read my profile online and got excited, I wanted to clear up any misunderstandings.
In a Something Awful exclusive, we reveal the true state of Darren Wilson after his harrowing encounter with Michael Brown.
gee, sun, thanks for life and warmth and light. you totally did it on purpose and aren't just a stupid exploding deathtrap
You say collaboration like it's a bad word.
The ocean is full of the stuff of nightmares and, no thanks to all that water, you can't even kill it with fire.
You Will Read This Headline. Then You'll Laugh. Then You'll Realize You Were Wrong All Along.
'We’re going to be in trouble!' Little Sister wailed, clutching her favorite book to her chest and sobbing. 'This isn’t fun like a story anymore!' But Big Sister was not listening, she was thinking. She grabbed Little Sister’s book from her and ran into town, yelling 'Help! A book made me and my sister hurt someone!'
I've been wanting to meet you all for the past few weeks, but I guess I cut an intimidating figure. I'm the new guy, with the cool job you've all surely been gossiping about. Yep, I'm the Lead Loremaster, and I'm here to enrich everything we do with much-needed lore.
Internet bullies have been ganging up on Assassin's Creed: Unity, claiming it's full of glitches. You might have seen a few screenshots that looked a little weird out of context.