No, not the Golden Globes. Disheveled and bleary-eyed after an all-night tequila binge with his parents, Lowtax has sobered up and posted the first (and probably last) installment of the 2000 Awful Awards, where he takes a look at the best and worst games of the year. Here's some things he learned from one of his top picks, No One Lives Forever:
Which games did Lowtax love? Which did he hate? Boxers or briefs? (Hint: none of the above.) All this and more can be found in the 2000 Awful Awards.
Wonder Dog Strikes Again
Taco The Wonder Dog has been hard at work banging his genetically altered paws against that synthesizer keyboard lately, and has composed a new MP3 for all to enjoy! (Enjoyment not guaranteed.) It's entitled Deus Ex Machina, or maybe Deu Sex Machina, I can't really tell from the filename. In any event, I would assume that it has something to do with Deus Ex, although I have been known to be wrong before. Enjoy!
He had a yellow inflatable tube around his waist, the kind with a comical duck head. There was a tiny fish in one of his hands, and a trident in the other. In the background a squirrel wearing shades was water skiing.
Republicans announce that all legislation must be voted on at 2am in a secret chamber, with no one but the lobbyists who write the bills seeing a single line of text. Democrats' Response: Stumbling around a field stepping on rakes, handles smashing them directly in their faces every single time.
For fans of meaningless awards, these awards are extra meaningless.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.