Kevin Emitseilu Ikhumetse's Home page, submitted by Ian. We don't normally highlight personal "about me" webpages here at Something Awful because, quite frankly, they usually aren't very overall entertaining. Sure there's maybe a splash page which might get a few laughs or some goofy quirk, but they usually lack any content. While that could be said about today's link, I have to admit that it has the absolute most hilarious opening sequence of introduction pages that I have ever seen. Much like the main site, they are completely unrelated to each other, make no sense, and are completely crazy. "KEVIN IKHUMETSE" is a Georgia Tech student from Nigeria. He has an awfully large head, one which tends to stay away from any coherent or logical thought patterns. Throughout this magical journey of a personal website, Kevin talks about Jesus, explains "Dargon ball Z," and brags about his site's CSS validity. It's all so exciting in a very psychotic and disturbing way.
Make three fast wishes
Wish Number One
Wish Number Two
Wish Number Three
Sorry I won't grant any
God couldn't take the time
to Bless us today
because we could not take the time
to thank Him yesterday
So why do I love cartoons like dargon ball Z ?
It is simply Awesome, so ask No questions, Just take it because I said so
I have being given A's for depleting Dragon ball Z the way it should be.
Woah. I wish I knew what I could say, but this website honestly baffles me. More power to you, Kevin, and congratulations for "depleting Dragon ball Z the way it should be." Once again, allow me to admit that I have no idea why I find the opening series of introduction pages so funny, but that probably explains why I'm running this website instead of getting a more legitimate job, such as shoveling coal into a giant robot's hole.
Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.