Kevin Emitseilu Ikhumetse's Home page, submitted by Ian. We don't normally highlight personal "about me" webpages here at Something Awful because, quite frankly, they usually aren't very overall entertaining. Sure there's maybe a splash page which might get a few laughs or some goofy quirk, but they usually lack any content. While that could be said about today's link, I have to admit that it has the absolute most hilarious opening sequence of introduction pages that I have ever seen. Much like the main site, they are completely unrelated to each other, make no sense, and are completely crazy. "KEVIN IKHUMETSE" is a Georgia Tech student from Nigeria. He has an awfully large head, one which tends to stay away from any coherent or logical thought patterns. Throughout this magical journey of a personal website, Kevin talks about Jesus, explains "Dargon ball Z," and brags about his site's CSS validity. It's all so exciting in a very psychotic and disturbing way.
Make three fast wishes
Wish Number One
Wish Number Two
Wish Number Three
Sorry I won't grant any
God couldn't take the time
to Bless us today
because we could not take the time
to thank Him yesterday
So why do I love cartoons like dargon ball Z ?
It is simply Awesome, so ask No questions, Just take it because I said so
I have being given A's for depleting Dragon ball Z the way it should be.
Woah. I wish I knew what I could say, but this website honestly baffles me. More power to you, Kevin, and congratulations for "depleting Dragon ball Z the way it should be." Once again, allow me to admit that I have no idea why I find the opening series of introduction pages so funny, but that probably explains why I'm running this website instead of getting a more legitimate job, such as shoveling coal into a giant robot's hole.
As the 19th century diver approaches a giant clam, a flash of brilliant golden light flares from within the shell. I emerge in a swirl of bubbles and do the timeless universal underwater hand signals for the following: ZODIAC KILLER, KKK, BLOOD OF YOUTH
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