The TYPE O NEGATIVE / PIST*ON FAMILY ALBUM, submitted by Gorgeous Lampshades of Wrestling. I've never been a very big fan of goth and industrial outfit Type O Negative, but apparently there are a lot of fans for the group on AOL. Apparently these fans also have the good looks and web design skills of a luddite bridge troll.

I am a real, live cauldron stirring Witch. I'm also working on my first real novel. (Ginger help!!) You can usually find me in the Type O Negative folder hanging around with some of the most beautiful females online (no I'm not kissing ass)......I currently reside in Houston, Texas and I'm Secretary to the owner of Stubbs Harley Davidson (no I won't get you a deal on a Harley)......don't bother to ask me if I'm single or married cuz I'm not gonna tell you. It shouldn't matter to you anyway.....You can visit my homepage if you like, sign the guest book damn it, at will leave you now with these parting words........Cuz when the moonlight hit the water, I had your sweet lips on my brain. And then I found the truth in writing, I read your letters in the rain.

While certainly no furries, the Type O negative AOL fanbase seems to consist of old, overweight, and intensely serious witches. But at least you have that beautiful 250k animated GIF and embedded music to sooth the senses in case this big boned album of pictures fails you.

– Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons (@sexyfacts4u)

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.

  • Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'

Copyright ©2015 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.