Presidential Election 2008 Full Coverage On Yahoo! News, submitted by me. Presidential election coverage already? No. Please. I have endured enough politics in the last five years to make my entire life miserable. It's a wonder that my hair hasn't fallen out in clumps and that I can go without weeping for almost a whole hour each day.
When I check out the news I want to see fires that have destroyed entire neighborhoods or fathers who have shot their entire familes then killed themselves, not this depressing shit. Can we all agree to put this election stuff off until the last possible minute and pick our next leader with the largest game of "Not It!" ever played?
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
Sorry about the blurry photo. I was lunging at my phone, yelling at it to take a clear picture. It's the only image of me that exists. I'd take another picture for you, but I'm in the middle of a rigorous trampoline session.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.