Where do spammers go when they're not spamming message boards and comment sections? WarriorForum, apparently!
WarriorForum is a message board where internet marketers ("IMers") congregate to talk shop about their noble calling: gaming the search-engine system so their low-content crud shows up whenever you Google anything. Apparently, many Warriors just happen to know a guy who makes a million dollars a month from IM. I suspect there's a lot of overlap between those guys and uncles who work at Nintendo.
SEO, or search engine optimization, is all about "making your website easy for both users and search engine robots to understand," as this now-deleted thread helpfully explains (yes, even spammer forums get spammed). "Master Article Marketer" Benjamin Ehinger would like to remind everyone that a true IM warrior doesn't need to resort to tricks and shortcuts to get great SEO as long as they have great content. This is one of his sites, by the way. Content is king!
Harnessing the power of SEO can lead to great fortune, but only if you're able overcome your fear of becoming obscenely wealthy, which is clearly a common and crippling obstacle. Still interested? It's easier than ever to become an IMer! Just check out this subforum, where a bunch of scummy SEO dudes try to unload sites on each other. For a mere 300 bucks, you can be the proud owner of a web site about iguanas. Plus, the seller will throw in all the fake Facebook fans he bought - what a steal!!!
Then there's Verena, whose patented IM techniques have angered gurus. She seems positively giddy about her "Premium Yeast Infection Website," based on her ghoulish boasts about the huge market of sufferers seeking legitimate medical information.
The life of an internet marketer isn't all sunshine and rainbows, though. Sometimes you have to interact with ungrateful customers. A Warrior named rrm kvetches about someone trying to take advantage of his good nature by requesting free consult time, when obviously he should be the one taking advantage by bilking them for $500 an hour.
Other times, you have to deal with ignorant so-called friends insisting that you should get a "real" job. The Warriors' advice? Stop hanging out with jealous haters and get new friends, preferably fellow entrepreneurs. Go ahead and laugh when you're an internet millionaire and your old friends, still stuck in stable 9-5 jobs with steady incomes, come crawling back for advice: You've earned it!
And remember, even if the internet marketing thing doesn't pan out, you can always ca$h in on WarriorForum itself by wringing thousands of dollars out of its gullible userbase!
Republicans announce that all legislation must be voted on at 2am in a secret chamber, with no one but the lobbyists who write the bills seeing a single line of text. Democrats' Response: Stumbling around a field stepping on rakes, handles smashing them directly in their faces every single time.
There is a witch hunt going on right now and I promise you that you will not find any witches in the pleasure room in my congressional office.
For fans of meaningless awards, these awards are extra meaningless.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.