This tattoo is the most interesting part of Whiteout. Seriously.Whiteout is a fascinating documentary about Liquid Paper, from the makers of Helvetica -- no wait, it's a shitty mash-up of better movies. Protip: If a shower scene adds nothing to a B-movie, the whole project was doomed from the start.
Dear filmmakers: Please stop making documentaries about fashion like The September Issue. No one cares. Love, Something Awful.
Some would probably blame X-Men Origins: Wolverine's lackluster performance at the box office on piracy. Others embrace piracy so they can avoid crap like X-Men Origins: Wolverine. And so it goes.
Next Day Air holds promise for fans of action-comedies, but as a name for a director, Benny Boom ranks right down there with McG. Sorry, Mike Epps, but it doesn't look like your big break will come any time in the next decade.
"Your left eye," the optometrist casually explained while blasting my face with a blue laser at point blank range, "is farsighted and shaped like an eyeball. The other eye is nearsighted and shaped like a football. Not even a good football."