Last week he told me the idea for krangslist and I thought it was sort of dumb at the time. Here we are on the next Tuesday and it's still pretty dumb, but I'm happy with it! Maybe it's because I was a huge Ninja Turtle nerd when I was a kid. I'm probably going to have to order a DVD copy of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze now, because that was bar-none my favorite movie for quite a long time. Remember the first time you realized the friendly scientist guy from that movie was the same guy that chained Captain Picard up all naked and tried to get him to see five lights? That messed me up.
Some guys trimmed the tree in my yard and found out one of the branches was hollow and home to a huge colony of slugs and some black widow spiders, living peacefully side-by-side. Big slugs, too. I saw them, they're like the size of hotdogs. So far this year has been a bad year for the me-tree relationship.
Elliot said my breakup must have been due to the sweater curse, an unexplained phenomenon where anyone who gives their significant other a hand-knit sweater gets dumped. The only way to break the curse, Elliot said, was to destroy the sweater.
Can't tell a drinking fountain from a urinal? We've got you covered. Brush up on your drinking fountain enthusiast -- or sipper -- vocabulary and learn to talk and swap sips with the best of them.
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!