Thank you, Livestock


Last week he told me the idea for krangslist and I thought it was sort of dumb at the time. Here we are on the next Tuesday and it's still pretty dumb, but I'm happy with it! Maybe it's because I was a huge Ninja Turtle nerd when I was a kid. I'm probably going to have to order a DVD copy of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze now, because that was bar-none my favorite movie for quite a long time. Remember the first time you realized the friendly scientist guy from that movie was the same guy that chained Captain Picard up all naked and tried to get him to see five lights? That messed me up.

They found a slug colony living in my tree


Some guys trimmed the tree in my yard and found out one of the branches was hollow and home to a huge colony of slugs and some black widow spiders, living peacefully side-by-side. Big slugs, too. I saw them, they're like the size of hotdogs. So far this year has been a bad year for the me-tree relationship.

"Until we meet again!"

– Johnny "Doc Evil" Titanium (@fart)

More Daily Dirt

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.