Overview: Four hookers are dropped off at a haunted death mansion with predictable results. Thundergod/Amish rape wizard David Carradine concocts a brilliant plan to kill-save them. Meanwhile, Dick Miller watches an old horror movie starring himself, and wonders aloud why he never won an Oscar. The fourth wall collapses and everyone dies of shame.
Directed By: Fred Olen Rey, 1992
The Case For: The first scene.
The Case Against: All of the other scenes.
"David Carradine will return as...The Ghost of Christmas Died from Masturbating Future"...
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Are we not allowed to be real parents anymore? We may have feared the CyborFreaks, but we damn well respected them and learned about boundaries.
A thousand years ago, dudes were dying from splinters, but now the wizard potion that cleans our light wounds costs less than a Dr. Pepper in 1994. I love this medicinal 7up.
Ron Paul spins in his chair, trying to grab his decorative antique musket but Freddy gets it first.
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