Overview: Four hookers are dropped off at a haunted death mansion with predictable results. Thundergod/Amish rape wizard David Carradine concocts a brilliant plan to kill-save them. Meanwhile, Dick Miller watches an old horror movie starring himself, and wonders aloud why he never won an Oscar. The fourth wall collapses and everyone dies of shame.

Directed By: Fred Olen Rey, 1992

The Case For: The first scene.

The Case Against: All of the other scenes.

"David Carradine will return as...The Ghost of Christmas Died from Masturbating Future"...

Special Effects-10
Music / Sound-6

– Garrett "Hydrogen" Neil and Sean "Trillaphon" Neil (@trillaphon)

More Reviews [Movies]

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Get In The God Dang Weight Room, Johnny Manziel!

    Get In The God Dang Weight Room, Johnny Manziel!

    Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.

  • Helping Your Real Friends Move

    Helping Your Real Friends Move

    A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.