Of course, the depression could only go on for so long before they finally reached the inevitable
conclusion: the revolution had, in fact, happened, but "The Man" had managed to suppress it using various illegal means such as putting slippery stuff on the ground so Paul supporters would trip, or announcing that Ron Paul's name must be spelled "Mike Huckabee" so the machines could read it.
Finally, they looked forward to the future, bouncing from this crushing defeat just in time to get smashed once again in New Hampshire. In the meantime, they'll continue to come up with great grassroots campaigns such as this one, which I found on their forums once but can't find again, so here's a copy/paste instead of a screengrab:
"Here is my idea, what if we could translate some awesome Ron Paul literature into Arabic targeting Iraqi's who live in Iraq, we know they can't cast a vote for Ron Paul but what they could do is have huge peaceful rally's in the streets of Iraq holding Ron Paul signs saying yes we are ready to take our country back for freedom. It could spread like wildfire. I bet very few Iraqi's know there is a candidate who advocates what Ron Paul does for getting us out of Iraq. Lets let them know and see if they support it en masse."
These debates, the first to occur after the Obama and Huckabee upsets in Iowa, were co-sponsored by Facebook in an attempt to appeal to people who can name more facts about ninjas and pirates than social security and universal healthcare. Facebook hosted a constantly updated webpage which included live comments from anyone who had an account and felt like typing something.
The comments highlighted both the success and failure of the debate's attempt to appeal to the youth vote. The demographic apparently watched in fairly high numbers, based on the number of comments on Facebook, but mostly came only to conclusions such as "Obama is kinda hot. He looks like my next-door neighbor, only hot" and "Ron Paul understands freedom because he says weed should be legal." Whenever people talk about the political power of the internet generation, I just laugh and log on to myspace to deny friend requests from a bunch of Russian bots pretending to be naked women whom I've never met but who have secret crushes on me.
Now let's talk about the debates individually.
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
Do you remember the crazy clothes and hair of the 1990s? Do you remember Crystal Pepsi and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Do you remember where you hid the box your mother gave you?
It's still okay to like Ben Stiller, guys.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.