Mean Girl Lindsay Lohan wantonly tore this from her notepad:
Dungeon Master Gary Gygax probably never counted on this being seen:
Shady lobbyist Jack Abramoff writes his notes in blood:
A lot of good men died to bring you the scratchings of Karl Rove:
From within the bowels of the office that brought you StarForce:
Quiet everybody, Jesse Jackson has something to say:
The treacherous New England Patriots are guilty of deflating their footballs. We must punish them severely in the name of holy retribution. This transgression has been the biggest headline in the United States for an entire week, and it should be the primary concern of all nations.
We have used extensive market research to determine the average consumers of America's favorite rolls of caramel-oozing choco cysts.
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