zit fetish's Journal, submitted by Tokyo Pete. Merry Christmas! Read about my zit fetish!
ok, so i'm 21 but i still dream about this hugely infected boil/pimple thing i had in my ear when i was 12. it hurt so damn much that one day after school when no one was at home i decided to deal to it. using cotton tips i squeezed and poked it for about a half hour with absolutely no joy. i was in agony and then all of a sudden it burst and all this yellowish liquid mixed with blood came out. i was like, hey no fair i want more than that, so i kept at it and sure enough after about 10 more minutes of squeezing i heard this almighty crack (being in my ear and all) and this endless stream of yellow hardened pus oozed out. i kept going at it and more and more just kept emerging. i couldn't believe it, i was laughing so hard as this disgusting pus just kept appearing. then, and this is the best bit, it seemed as if there was nothing more to squeeze, when, with one more really hard and deep sqeeze i heard another crack and this BRIGHT GREEN semi-runny pus shot out of my ear and onto my cream carpet. i spent another 5 or so minutes dealing to the green pus, of which there seemed to be an almost endless supply. finally, it was all over. i collected all the pus on a tissue and there was so much pus it didn't seem possible it had come from one place, especially my ear. i waited til my mum came home and i showed her - she was absolutley disgusted, and it was the start of my pimple fetish and my realisation that other people didn't feel the same satisfaction about such things. that is all.
Merry Christmas! Pop a zit for Jesus!
"I thought the internet was all fun and games. Grow virtual plants on Facebook. Send email to grandma. IM friends with emojis," said the Stupid Ass Teenager, currently dying in an Idiot County hospital. "Never in my wildest dreams could I ever possibly humanly imagine that doing stupid ass internet shit in real life might get me mortally injured."
(Lips smacking, mouth full of peanut butter, glistening streams of peanut butter oil running down chin) "I'm full as hell, and I'm not going to take another bite!"
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