Shut up.

Does her boyfriend ejaculate battery acid or something?

There are only two people in the world who have read this post. One is the shut-in that has lost both her legs to diabetes, and the other is me. If you read this post, you'll be one of us. Don't do it!

It certainly doesn't make your brain bigger, that's for sure.

I go take a dump four times a day and I love it.

That's funny. You're funny. You're a funny guy.

I don't think you're penetrating too deep. They are hinting that you should take a shower.

More The Weekend Web

This Week on Something Awful...

About This Column

There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.

Previous Articles

Suggested Articles

Copyright ©2018 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.