Subject: Mr.Blue

You can ask Mr. Blue to have this little issue with Rogues looked into.

When playing as a rogue, I can sap things, putting them out of commission for a decent amount of time. Not DAMAGING them, but just a method of crowd control, letting me go about my flag capping business.

HOWEVER, a Hunter or Warlock can still direct their pet, give orders, assign targets etc etc. They can't cast spells (ie talk or think straight) or move around (ie give directions) but somehow they can still tell their pets what to do and who to attack.

If a pet is already out, fine, let it go into aggressive mode with an agro range while it defends its master, or if ordered to a particular task, to keep doing that task. But a pet should NOT be able to be summoned or given orders while the owner is sapped.

My 'toon's details? You didn't ask, but sign it:

  • Name: Sephoslyfoot
  • Level: 60
  • Race: Undead
  • Class: Rogue
  • Guild: Hikari No Senshi
  • Realm: Lothar
  • Blood Type: I'm undead, I don't have blood, you n00b.

This message is intended for use only by the individual(s) to whom it is specifically addressed above and should not be read by, or delivered to any other person. Such material may contain privileged and confidential information. IF THE READER OF THIS MESSAGE IS NOT THE INTENDED RECIPIENT YOU ARE HEREBY NOTIFIED THAT ANY DISSEMINATION, DISTRIBUTION OR COPYING OF THIS COMMUNICATION IS STRICTLY PROHIBITED. THANK YOU FOR YOUR COOPERATION.

CE MESSAGE EST DESTINÉ SEULEMENT À LA PERSONNE DÉSIGNÉE ET PEUT CONTENIR DES RENSEIGNEMENTS CONFIDENTIELS. S’il ne s’adresse pas à vous, PRIÈRE DE NE PAS copier, distribuer, ni utiliser les renseignements s’y rapportant. Si vous avez reçu cette TÉLÉCOPIE par erreur, veuillez téléphoner immédiatement à l’expéditeur pour l’en aviser. Merci de votre collaboration.

Oh Canada,

I am sorry, but it appears that I am unable to reprint this email in my column to be answered. It’s a shame too, because I am sure the answer would be most satisfying. It is not for a lack of trying – at first I considered feigning ignorance, claiming that I was from Blizzard Europe, and therefore only could read and write in French. But alas, the disclaimer has that certain je-ne-sais-pas-quoi that prohibits me from doing so.

I apologize Sephoslyfoot, but with all of the personal information you have been kind enough to send to me, I am certain one of my readers will be able to find you in game and answer your question, whatever it was (I did not actually read this question). Condolences, and good luck to you in finding a guild that wasn’t named after something uttered in last week's Adult Swim!

See you later, Space Cowboy…

Blue

Subject: QUESTIONS 4 U.

I read the long article on WoW, and heard about the inside, Mr. Blue. I was wondering of what areas of blizzard he is educated and if he has knowledge of the "Game Masters" or unknown areas in azeroth such as GM or Developer's Island. I just had some questions about these things.

Thank You,
chaz



Allo Chaz,

There is very little I actually do know about, to be perfectly honest. I generally rely on Thottbot, Penny Arcade and the GM Auto-Response system. I also know tons about breakfast cereal, and discussing the historical significance of very large numbers. If you have any questions pertaining to the weekly antics of Tycho and Gabe, or simply want to talk about Great 981,423,832nd’s day – I will be able to respond helpfully. All other answers I will probably make up on the fly, and then attempt to get my co-workers to join in on as a massive in-joke that ends up ruining WoW Customer Service for millions (much like the introduction of the PvP ranking system.)

As for Developer’s Island (or The Isle of Developers, as Caydiem calls it), it is fantastic. All the luxuries you could ever want: an auction house with no deposit, and a mail system with zero latency. The interactive “Battle Corral” allows for GMs and Devs to engage in combat, while mounted. No one ever complains about the PvP balance or not being Powerful enough because all of the content on Developer’s Island is patched to 1.13, which is perfect in every way, having addressed all concerns. It is a land where all mobs are rare boss spawns, the Thorium Veins are full of Arcanite Crystals instead of Dense Stone, and everyone helps each other make fun of the players that suffer on the “outside”. There are also vendors on Developer’s Island that sell booze, which is sent to our cubes via Delivery Robots, at very reasonable prices.

However, Developer Island isn’t just for Blizzard Employees – we often have various Real Life Celebrities take part in beta testing the Flying Mounts, as well as various Make a Wish foundation sickbags who wished to spend their last moments in a world where “Abolish Disease” actually works. Oh, and there’s free porno too, which us GMs often watch with our beautiful girlfriends while we answer the player bases’ miserable petitions. Good luck finding the entrance to the place however – most players that have stumbled upon it in Deadwind Pass usually end up missing the jump anyways.

Where it’s always Summer and never the Feast of Winter's Veil,

Blue

More The Art of Warcraft

This Week on Something Awful...

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.