Kernel Poppy's Kidzone, submitted by Dan. Why yes, this is yet another scary and frightening site dedicated to children. We sure don't have enough of those! This site features the unusual mascot, Kernal Poppy, an actual kernal of corn!
I am yellow
I am corn
When I came to life
I had no clue
about my prospects
as a food
So I studied hard
and began to see
There were many things
I could be
If destiny was mine to choose
It meant I had a duty, too
I knew I was tasty and naturally sweet
So I decided to be a healthy treat!
I have no idea what this teaches kids. I assume it just tells them that no matter what they do, they will be eaten alive. Of course with corn, that's not necessarily the last stop on the journey of life. We won't go into that, though. At least this site hasn't been updated in ages. I guess that's a good thing.
Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.