Joy of Tech, submitted by Psylent. I don't use computers a whole lot outside of the Time Scope but this web site absolutely reeks of Commie plot. It's some sort of Internet comic minus the paper and I really don't understand any of the jokes, and I don't think that's because I don't know about computers, I think it's because they all suck worse than this scary Thai hooker I met who filed her teeth into points. Plus they're all about Macintoshes, which are like computers for gay men and people who buy electronics because of how pretty the case looks and not how booming the bass is like they should.
I get it, they're getting married because they're both boring computer jerks who think you can get pregnant from kissing and that a hot date is watching Family Guy DVDs and eating over the sink. I don't believe this is real though because all the computer nerd people at the Timelab have their hair in these stupid pony tails and have unkempt beards and smell like hot dogs and sweat.
Speaking of getting pregnant from kissing, there was this one time when the Time Portal malfunctioned and sent me to an alternate timeline where slugs had evolved to the dominant life things on earth and I seduced their leader but I wasn't sure if it was a guy or a girl and Dr. Chronos stopped me just as I was about to kiss it and said "they give you babies" or something so I shot it with a machinegun instead. That was a wild ride.
Expert analysis on the few things your cat likes and the many things it hates.
The CEO of Lobstero, makers of the expensive home Lobster System, responds to recent unfavorable headlines about hand-squeezing a lobster out of one of the company's Lobster Packs.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.