MY STORIES IN ENGLISH VERSION, submitted by pr0jekt. Are you ready for some hot hot stories about Japanese women kicking Japanese men in the groin? No? Well, maybe the classic story BE WELL-MANNERED IN THE RESTAULANT will change your mind.

I stood up and slammed my fist onto the fried egg. The egg was crushed.
"My boss is out now", she answered calmly.
"You bitch!" I shouted and threw the crushed egg at her. She dodged the egg and got angry.
"You threw the egg!" she said angrily. "Have you not learned that you must be careful about meals!"
Saying so, she stepped forward to me and slammed her knee to my groin. A heavy shock burst in my balls.
I shouted and fell on my knee. I lost breath due to the tremendous pain in my testes. I could not even move.

I came.

– Zachary "Spokker Jones" Gutierrez

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

  • The Fandangling Fables of Groggery Gibbonman

    The Fandangling Fables of Groggery Gibbonman

    'We’re going to be in trouble!' Little Sister wailed, clutching her favorite book to her chest and sobbing. 'This isn’t fun like a story anymore!' But Big Sister was not listening, she was thinking. She grabbed Little Sister’s book from her and ran into town, yelling 'Help! A book made me and my sister hurt someone!'

  • Enter: the Lead Loremaster

    Enter: the Lead Loremaster

    I've been wanting to meet you all for the past few weeks, but I guess I cut an intimidating figure. I'm the new guy, with the cool job you've all surely been gossiping about. Yep, I'm the Lead Loremaster, and I'm here to enrich everything we do with much-needed lore.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.