Duck Hunting and Goose Hunting at TakeEm, submitted by me. TakeEm is a website devoted to duck hunting and duck hunting products. As a duck lover I cannot say that I approve of this website and the men with very small penises that flock to it. They have a section with advice on how to kill ducks.

Understand what influences them. Become aware of the many different factors that can influence the mallard.

Determine how they react to these influences. It's not just enough to become aware of the many factors that influence the mallard duck. Specifically, how do they react to those influences?

Establish patterns and tendencies based upon their reaction to those influences. Understand how mallard ducks react to different influences, exploit this reaction or habit, and you will become a much more successful mallard duck hunter.

I thought you just shoot the damn things, not take them on a fucking date. Do you find a duck that enjoys hip hop music and then play a track from P Diddy's new album and then shoot the duck as he gets down with his bad self? You sicken me! They even have duck hunting related wallpapers.

Ah, what a calm and soothing scene. NOW SHOOT THE MOTHER FUCKERS.

– Zachary "Spokker Jones" Gutierrez

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.