Smash My Phone, submitted by Minty. The Germans are known for two things, driving tanks over piles of skulls, and bizarre sexual fetishes. This isn't one of the really disgusting ones I've seen out there, but it's pretty high up there on sheer stupidity.

I guess the whole deal is that you send in your cell phone and watch some bimbo smash it while you jack off into a top hat. Ok I made up the part about the top hat, but that's my fantasy so back off. Somebody please send in your phone and then send me the pictures if they actually smash it. I promise I'll use it to masturbate. Also send a top hat because I left mine on the trolly.

– Reid "Frolixo" Paskiewicz

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Get In The God Dang Weight Room, Johnny Manziel!

    Get In The God Dang Weight Room, Johnny Manziel!

    Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.

  • Helping Your Real Friends Move

    Helping Your Real Friends Move

    A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.