Pet Smart Howl-O-Ween Contest, submitted by nFluxx. No one loves celebrating Halloween more than pets! It's their time to shine.

Alex is a 6-year-old Bearded Dragon from Gulf Breeze, FL

"This lizard has been the best pet ever. He is so easy to care for and is very interesting. We have taken Alex to my children's schools and the kids love learning about desert lizards. People are shocked that his spikes are not sharp to the touch," says proud Pet Parent, Stephanie.

I wonder if Alex loves kids learning about him as much as kids love learning about desert lizards.

"She's crazy! She put a fucking plastic cowboy hat and costume on me and is sitting me on top of a toy horse. What is this, a fucking trophy? What did I win, most humiliated bearded dragon from Gulf Breeze, FL? Sheesh," says horrified pet Alex.

Maybe PETA should do their job for once. Instead of throwing buckets of blood on kids eating at KFC and taking insulin injections derived from the animal testing they hate, they can go after all these crazy shits who dress up their pets. And by the way, Pet Smart can go to hell for encouraging this sort of behavior. I thought you guys were supposed to be on the pet's side!

– Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons (@sexyfacts4u)

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