A Vampire's Diary..., submitted by Liz. AAARGH! A MEAT VAMPIRE SUCKS TEH FAT OUT OF HER VICTIAMS AND REPLACES IT WITH SHITHOLE POETRY!!!! Aaargh! Thes siet si teh PITS! Teh webmastarar is soem doopy dummy who think she si 4000 years old and si an immortale vampiare who si skinney in her pictars but FAT AS A MULE in real life so its a conflict of interest if yuo asks me!!! she writes poetry, haikues, stories, and othar stuped goth crap shit about wearing black and listening to TEH CURE starring ROBERT SMITH KING OF THE UNDEAD!!!
I feel the need to breakdown and cry
Now if I only knew why I feel like this
It happens everyday continuously
We never get used to it we only learn
To deal with it a little better each day
Each day I fight off these tears and
Continue to hide beneath another mask
Sometimes it fails to work as I feel a
Tear shed and roll down my pale cheek
OH VAMPIARE MISTRESS< TEH SOLUTIAN TOO YUOR TEARS SI TO WHINE ON AN ANGELFIRE WEBSIET!!! DR. CLAMSHELL PRESCRIBES A DOSE OF 500 MILLILITERS OF GOTH WHINEYINGNESS!!! she demands yuo too download her 10 zillion fonts while she downloades HOSTESS SNACK CAKES to her pale white gut! hahahahahahaha, stuped fat vampairs!
This entire site, the diary, the stories, the poetry, portrayed personalities, and distinctive likenesses of all my characters and the works of the owner are subject to all applicable copyright laws resulting from their registration. Violation of these statutes will be considered grounds for action on behalf of the copyright holder and will lead to legal recourse being sought.
HAHAHAH I JUST COPYED HER COPYRIGHT!!! I HOPE TEH VANMPAIRE LAWYARS DONT COME AFTAR ME AND SUE ME FOR MY BANDAID COLLECTION! FAT CHANCE, TIME TRAVELING VANMPAIRE BAKERY CHEF!!! also her emale si "IAMSATANSGIRLFRIEND" so she might kills me with DEMON POWARS!!! OH NO!!! Tiem to hide in teh closet until Demon DairyCow passes by!!! I WILL PLAY TEH CURE ON FULL VOLUME IF YUO PROMISE NOT TO TELL ME POETRY, VANMPIRE WOMAN!!!
PS: HEAR SI HER VANMPAIRE GUESTBOOK YUO CAN SIGNS!!! MAKE SURE TO PUT "I AM SATAN, PLES WRITE ME MORE STUPED POETRY YUO COWPIG OR ELSE I WILL NOT LET YUUO BE A VANMPAIER ANYMORE!!!" and then she will haev to go back to being a short ordar cook at Denneys.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH AHAHAHAHHA HAHAHHAHaHa aaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!
AAAHAH AHAHAHHAHAHAHH AHHAHAHhaahahahaha hhhahhhfoih//////~
Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.
The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'
This ain't your daddy's globe...! .... or is it?!
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.