The Vigilant Citizen achieved some measure of notoriety last year by repeatedly insisting Lady Gaga was an Illuminati mindplant. Because, as everyone knows, the Illuminati are at their most powerful when they just sort of show symbolism wherever, which is to be recognized as symbolism, and people go "Oh, let's give that a VMA." The VMAs are the most powerful tool of the illuminati, used to recruit only the best and brightest, who are at home watching MTV rather than going out with their easily influenced peers.
The Vigilant Citizen is actually a neat intersection between pop culture and insane culture. They keep up with nice-sounding Russian pop I haven't heard yet, and they discuss the new Kanye West video, and though they blather on about how all these people are going to rule over us one day, I'd still rather get this information from here than from Stereogum. (After all, who is crazier, the people who think that fantastically rich people have a ton of political influence, or the people who think Best Coast is worth listening to?)
Anyway, I'm glad these guys can show me how Dave Chapelle hates the Illuminati, too. I know I keep harping on the Illuminati here. So do these guys. They also harp on all kinds of mind control and how to fight it - they want you to be a vigilant citizen, like the name implies. But your citizenship had better not be of an Illuminati-controlled country (all of them). Instead. you get to be a vigilant citizen of the nation of people who watch videos and obsessively say "Man, see? A pyramid! And it's a total structure of power! I told you!" So go on and click, sign up for that anti-country.This will guarantee you a spot as the most interesting guy at the party everyone talks to for a maximum of ten minutes.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Today's viral teen news beat, brought to you by Mike from the Internet!
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Doing some reps on the water bottle huh. I prefer bench press myself. Just kidding - stay hydrated.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.