Espanol SWAT
Zack: Ritmo Traicion y Mullet. Actually that's like some sort of hyper-mullet. Turbo mullet, maybe. The Quantum Mullet.
Dr. Thorpe: The story of one man's quest to find the psychopath who left burning dog poo on his porch.
Zack: This would be an example of a movie where it might have been a good idea to go for an incoherent and overly-complicated artistic rendering for the cover.
Dr. Thorpe: They could have spruced it up with a picture of a man in a rabbit suit getting crushed between two gigantic golden cogs while a naked woman in a samurai mask laughs with glee. It might not stick to the story one hundred percent, but it would really capture the spirit of it.
Zack: A woman in tattered clothing suspended by a golden chain above a gigantic metal face while two shirtless men fight each other with swords. Maybe with a huge bazooka and an explosion in the background. With an Indian flying a jet fighter.
Dr. Thorpe: Yeah, or let's say a huge evil face made out out of smoke coming out of an erupting volcano in the background, and in the foreground there's a woman getting her shirt torn off by a metal dinosaur.
Zack: Or like a big crowd of people in skeleton suits in the background and a cyclops is playing a guitar in the foreground and it is shooting fire and burning off the bandages of a mummy so that you can see it's a naked woman underneath. And her boobs are sort of melting.
Dr. Thorpe: That might be going a little bit over the top, we might want something a little more subdued, a like a buxom angel in sheer lingerie wrestling a gigantic flaming cobra on top of a spaceship that's about to crash into the sun.
Zack: Okay, get this, how about a dude made out of sausages and he's shooting a machinegun up into the air and he's wearing a leather jacket with Xs for each time he runs his casings over a saucer-sized areola and he's standing in Las Vegas and there are drugs flying out of the top of his head while a femandroid cowers at his side and a gang of ninjas poses in the background while a helicopter flies past and a woman in a trampy outfit is knocking on his groin while another woman with a puff of stringy black hair is curled at his feet with her throat slashed open by a gigantic metal hippie wig.
Dr. Thorpe: If that's a reference to something, I guess I don't get it.
Zack: I'd see that if they had a part with snakes on an airplane or something. I never saw such a premise!
