Ask Emily Anything!
The crazy advice maven is back and she's brought with her a new plethora of sad lives and misery and barrels. I am not sure what the barrels are for. Just head on over to the brand spankin' new Ask Emily column and read what advice she had to give to losers like you.
I would like to ask you a serious question about hot teenage love. There is a girl in my journalism class, and she is very pretty. I fuck around in class all the time, and she always laughs and says 'Gee, you're really funny.' I think she likes me, and I know for a fact that she's single, but I don't know what to do. She thinks I'm funny, likes my jokes, and is very pretty. I want some advice to get into her pantaloons please!
To find out the answer to this and other hard-hitting questions that affect you and will continue to affect you until you DIE, go over there and read the stuff. It's not like I'm saying all of this for my health, you know.
Do all of your holiday shopping in the Star Citizen online store! We have great deals on space ships for a game that may not be released for years. Think of these as investments in your future enjoyment.
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
It's still okay to like Ben Stiller, guys.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.