If you were a Good Citizen you would be concerned about the shameful state of our Great Country's Southern Border. But you are not a good citizen, which is why you are browsing this website instead of securing our lands and fighting off the hordes of slavering immigrants desperate for work and a chance to make a better life for their offspring. Since you are here you might as well benefit from goons who have put their towering intellects to work developing innovative solutions for the Homeland. Take a deep breath in through your nose. Do you smell something? It is your filthy unwashed body, you slob. But there is also a whiff of spruce trees and gun smoke, a crisp arousing scent that permeates your being and stirs a long-dormant desire to run your hand through amber fields of grain. That is the smell of our Fair Land, free at last from the tired and poor thanks to these degenerates.
This is the future Like A Cigarette Should wants.
Levi Johnston confronts his own mortality and offers his support for a new candidate for president.
Self-driving pizza delivery cars were an invention never meant for this world.
A sign proclaiming "BACTA: DA FUTURE" marks the town's medical clinic
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.