Your professors don't care about your time. They don't care that writing essays interfere with your Madden07 season or your regimented beer-pong practice schedule before the tournament. Hell, most professors don't even care about the quality of your paper. No, they only care about the bottom line, length.
Midterms are coming up for most universities. Since my school has a bizarre schedule, I'm already on spring break. I know you're jealous, but I'm here to help you. Writing essays is 10% learning the information, 90% learning the system.
Writing a ten-page paper can be difficult, but by following these steps you can write at least fifteen with minimal effort. We all know the common changes like larger margins and periods, but here are a few tricks that are about to revolutionize the field.
This is a sample essay with the most important features pointed out.
* Some of the best Novel-it-up Techniques include:
Tucker Carlson's idiot brother just called New York mayor Bill de Blasio's spokeswoman a "LabiaFace."
Hey, have you guys ever seen a picture of a cat before? Well, guess what. It’s your lucky day, because I’m mixing the concept of a picture of my cat with the concept of the Internet!
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.