|02/20/11||KinFX Face Depumpkinizing Salon Gel - Bath & Body Works||$768.00|
|02/21/11||4 Jackets from the Cindy McCain Collection - Nordstrom's||$375.00|
|03/09/11||10 Golf Shirts, Albino Woman's Medium - Macy's||$206.00|
|03/09/11||14 Golf Shirts, 14 khaki shorts, Adult Baby Size - Macy's||$374.00|
|03/27/11||FollowMe Twitter Bot - Chinese Trojan Free Software (Unless You Want Trojan)||$1000.00|
|04/02/11||Swarovski Crystal, Diamond and 24 kt Gold Faberge Egg (Dinosaur Size) in Rhino Horn Display Stand - Tiffany's||$500,000.00|
|04/18/11||Hickory Dracula's "Bumpkin" Widow's Peak Sculpting Comb - Paul Ryan's Amazon Wishlist||$600.00|
|05/12/11||Pain & Suffering Installment to Family of Baby Emotionally Harmed By Wife's Unearthly Gaze||$8,002.00|
|06/09/11||Brownback Deluxe Package Complete Campaign Staff - Liberty University||$75,000.00|
|06/11/11||Royalties Payment for Without FDR: Alf Landon's Peaceful Settlement with Hitler to the Benefit of Free Markets Alternate History Novel||$28.00|
|06/18/11||How to Convince Everyone You are Seriously, Actually Running for President Without Even Trying - Amazon||$18.75|
|06/20/11||TV Roundtable Appearance Fee - Fox News - This Week in Videos of Obama to Shake Your Fist At||$450.00|
|06/29/11||Mistress's Hotel Room - Concord, NH Marriott||$255.00|
|06/29/11||Dominatrix's Hotel Room - Concord, NH Marriott||$255.00|
|06/29/11||Wife's Hotel Room - Concord, NH Marriott||$255.00|
|07/07/11||Drunken Calls to Texas Governor's Mansion - AT&T||$74.00|
|07/18/11||"My Other Dick is a Scaife" Novelty Boxers (500) - Ecuador T-shirt Incorporated||$1,318.00|
|07/18/11||"I'm a Washington Outsider" T-shirt (500) - Ecuador T-shirt Incorporated||$1,008.00|
|02/08/12||"Congratulations! We Won New Hampshire!" Banner Cancellation||$85.00|
|02/09/12||Refund for Unused Portion of Brownback Deluxe Package - Liberty University||$12,800|
Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.
The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'
This ain't your daddy's globe...! .... or is it?!
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.