You won't have to wait until next Wednesday to find out what's going to happen on the next episode of South Park; thanks to our super-secret Hollywood connections, Something Awful has secured the first three pages of what will surely be another award-winning adventure in social commentary. Matt Stone and Trey Parker-you masters of American satire-we salute you!
It's time to get a new TV. Your old one was made like two years ago, and so much has changed. You might as well be looking at a dinosaur's butthole. Why would you keep doing that, when you could be looking at a robot's butthole?
This libtard terminator keeps asking for guns that don't exist and I may have to close early out of frustration.
My game is funded. Now I know everything.
Sea of Thieves: Reduced the number of quest types from 3 to 2
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.